If you can’t quit p*rn, this is for you

Summary

In a thought-provoking video by Pierre Dalati, he explores the common addiction of pornography and offers practical steps toward overcoming it. Dalati emphasizes that to quit porn, you don't have to stop completely; instead, you need to replace the craving with new habits, find a sense of purpose, and practice moderation. By becoming self-aware and letting go of a victim mentality, individuals can start to win the mental battle against porn addiction. Dalati highlights the importance of setting achievable goals and surrounding oneself with a supportive community for lasting change.

Highlights

• Pornography is a common addiction due to its instant pleasure and accessibility 📱.
• The first step in overcoming porn addiction is developing self-awareness about your reasons for indulging 💭.
• Training your mind to resist urges can help regain control over your actions 🧠.
• Replace the craving for porn with new habits and activities to keep yourself busy 🎨.
• Practice moderation by setting a specific time you are allowed to indulge, making it easier to skip at times 🕒.
• Finding a purpose or goal, like athletes in training, can override the urge for pornography and help maintain focus ⚡.
• Building a supportive community around self-improvement fosters accountability and growth 👫.

Key Takeaways

• You don't have to quit porn all at once. Moderation can be the key to overcoming addiction 🚦.
• Self-awareness is the first step. Understand your reasons for watching porn and tackle them head-on 💡.
• Replace the habit with alternative activities like exercise or hobbies to distract yourself 🚴.
• Set small, achievable goals instead of going cold turkey. This keeps the pressure off and enhances success 🥅.
• Finding purpose in life can greatly help diminish the craving for instant pleasure and pornography 🚀.
• Join a community for support and accountability. Having a network can make all the difference 🤝.

Overview

Pierre Dalati's latest video tackles the challenging yet relatable issue of pornography addiction, offering viewers an insightful guide to breaking free from its grip. Dalati assures his audience that the road to recovery does not require quitting porn altogether but rather replacing it with healthier habits and activities. By emphasizing self-awareness and dismissing a victim mentality, he provides actionable steps to regain control over your mind and actions.

Understanding the underlying reasons behind the addiction is crucial in this journey. Dalati encourages his viewers to analyze their need for instant pleasure and find productive ways to satisfy that urge instead. By setting achievable goals and practicing moderation, individuals can begin to manage their addiction more effectively, making progress without overwhelming pressure.

A significant part of overcoming any addiction is finding your sense of purpose. Dalati illustrates this with examples seen in the world of sports, where athletes channel their focus and energy toward their goals. He emphasizes the value of community support and accountability, highlighting the private community he's created for like-minded individuals seeking self-improvement. Armed with these strategies, viewers are provided with a roadmap to start their journey toward a more balanced and fulfilling life.

Chapters

• 00:00 - 00:30: Introduction to Porn Addiction The chapter titled 'Introduction to Porn Addiction' discusses the pervasive nature of porn addiction, highlighting its prevalence and accessibility. Unlike other addictions such as cigarettes or alcohol, which require a purchase and specific settings to consume, pornography is readily available at one's fingertips via devices like smartphones. This chapter centers on the concept that overcoming pornography addiction doesn't necessitate an immediate or complete stop, suggesting a gradual approach may be more effective. The goal is to set the stage for understanding porn addiction not just as a common habit, but one influenced by modern technological conveniences.
• 00:30 - 01:00: Self-awareness and Acknowledgment This chapter discusses the crucial first step in overcoming addiction, which is self-awareness and acknowledgment of the problem. It emphasizes that certain addictions, like pornography, are hard to overcome due to their accessibility. The chapter compares pornography addiction to other addictions, like alcohol and nicotine, explaining that each has underlying causes and dependencies. Self-awareness involves understanding why these dependencies exist and recognizing the need for change.
• 01:00 - 01:30: Understanding the Urge This chapter delves into the reason behind engaging in certain habits like watching porn, specifically pointing out boredom and the search for immediate pleasure as key motivators. It emphasizes the importance of self-awareness in understanding why these habits are formed in the first place. The narrator encourages readers to shift away from a victim mentality and view overcoming these habits not as an immediate personal benefit, but as an investment in one's future self. It's about realizing that current discipline is crucial for future well-being.
• 01:30 - 02:00: Overcoming the Urge This chapter discusses the internal struggle of giving into the immediate urge to watch porn. It addresses the instant gratification that comes from fulfilling the urge versus the regret that often follows afterwards. The comparison is made between satisfying this urge and giving in to a crying baby, emphasizing the lack of self-control and the cycle of dissatisfaction that occurs post-indulgence.
• 02:00 - 02:30: Replacing the Habit In 'Replacing the Habit,' the chapter discusses the concept of training the brain in a similar manner to training a baby when it cries. It emphasizes that when you give in to urges, it reinforces the behavior, making it consistent that if you have an urge, you'll eventually act on it. Instead, the chapter suggests that by not giving into these mental urges and letting them pass, you can eventually train your brain to gain more control, just like a baby learns that crying doesn't necessarily provide them with what they want if it's not met with a response.
• 02:30 - 03:00: Moderation Strategy The chapter 'Moderation Strategy' discusses the concept of regaining control over one's mind by understanding and addressing pornography addiction. It emphasizes the importance of replacing the craving associated with this addiction with a new, healthier habit. The brain naturally seeks stimulation, and therefore, abrupt cessation can be challenging. Gradual reduction and substitution of habits are necessary to manage addiction effectively instead of completely avoiding it, which may be unsustainable in the long run.
• 03:00 - 03:30: Physical vs Mental Addiction The chapter discusses the difference between physical and mental addiction, particularly focusing on pornography addiction. It emphasizes the importance of not just counting days of abstinence, as this can feel like a restrictive battle. Instead, it suggests mitigating urges by replacing them with other activities or habits—such as exercise, social interaction, or skill development—thereby redirecting focus and breaking the cycle of addiction.
• 03:30 - 04:00: Finding Purpose The chapter "Finding Purpose" discusses strategies for overcoming pornography addiction by choosing battles that are winnable. It emphasizes that declaring a permanent quit is difficult and may intensify urges due to the pressure it creates. Instead, moderation is suggested as a more feasible approach for pornography, distinguishing it from addictions like nicotine or alcohol which involve physical dependencies.
• 04:00 - 04:30: Accountability and Community Support The chapter discusses the importance of setting personal guidelines as a mental strategy to enhance accountability and productivity. It suggests scheduling leisure activities or habits at a specific time (e.g. 9 p.m.) to maintain focus and productivity throughout the day. This approach helps individuals feel a sense of accomplishment by 'winning the battle' against distractions until the designated time, reinforcing discipline and control over one's actions.
• 04:30 - 05:00: Conclusion and Call to Action The chapter discusses the concept of temptation and the urge to partake in habitual activities, such as checking a phone at 9:00 p.m., and relates it to substance dependence. It outlines how resistance to these habits can grow over time, similar to withdrawal symptoms in substance abuse. The chapter references a video by Healthy Gamer GG, which discusses how the physical need for substances like alcohol can be so strong that stopping abruptly may lead to severe withdrawal symptoms, which can include cramps and seizures. It also hints at parallels with other non-substance-based habits such as watching porn, emphasizing the psychological aspect of these habits.

If you can’t quit p*rn, this is for you Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 to quit porn you don't have to completely stop now I know it's a very bold statement but it'll all make sense so just keep watching the video first of all pornography is one of the most common addictions so you're not alone now why is it that way because it offers instant pleasure and it's very accessible you see if you're addicted to cigarettes you're addicted to alcohol you need to go out of your way buy that substance take it somewhere drink it or smoke it and then you feel it for pornography and masturbating all you need is this device which you always have on you your boy down there which is not going anywhere and you probably
• 00:30 - 01:00 spend a lot of time in your room so you can do it anytime so that also makes it a very hard addiction to overcome because it's always accessible to you you can always do it the first step to curing a problem comes from self-awareness you need to acknowledge it why do you have this problem why do you want to watch pornography so bad you know with alcohol it's because you're trying to escape reality it's something you become dependent on with nicotine maybe it's something that started off with a head rush and then now it's something that your body depends on with pornography for the most part it's
• 01:00 - 01:30 simply because you want pleasure and you're bored that's pretty much it you're bored you got nothing else to do and you know that jerking off watching porn will give you instant pleasure and an instant dopamine Rush right now now once you become self-aware to why you have this problem and why it is you're doing it you need to then get rid of that victim mentality and realize that it's not about you you're not stopping porn for you right now this is not to help you right now then you might be asking well Pier who am I doing this for you're doing this for the future version of yourself and the reason I say this is because often times when you have the
• 01:30 - 02:00 urge to watch porn it's for yourself right now and you feel like oh my God I have to do this right now or else I'll be bored or else I won't feel as good it's something I can get instant pleasure right now why not do it let me just do it but you're completely forgetting about that version of view that will have that post not Clarity and be like oh why did I do that or that version of you that will wake up tomorrow morning and be like I wish I didn't watch porn last night because what happens when you really feel the urge to do it right now and then you give into it it's the exact same thing as when a baby cries and eventually you give in and give it what it wants you
• 02:00 - 02:30 train the baby that it needs to cry for this amount of time and eventually you'll give in and it's the same thing with your brain you have the urge you give in you do it but now you're training yourself mentally that okay if I have the urge if I sit on it for a little bit I'll give into it eventually and I'll do it what if the baby cries and you don't give it what it wants you let it cry and you let it cry and you let it cry eventually they'll learn that themb crying doesn't amend to anything they don't get what they want and so if you get that urge mentally but you constantly let it go you don't give into it eventually you'll gain more control
• 02:30 - 03:00 over your mind than your mind has over you and that's simply to acknowledge what pornography addiction is and how it works but now the next step is how do you actually stop the first thing is to replace the craving with a new habit because the brain needs stimulation the baby crying and you've learned it to cry long enough until you give it but you can't go from hyper stimulation to none at all you can't go from doing it every single day of the week to stopping just like that so you need to replace that craving because if you devote your whole life trying to avoid something that
• 03:00 - 03:30 thing still controls you and that's why when it comes to pornography and addiction and trying to stop it you don't count the day because all you're doing is restricting yourself and creating a battle you can't win so instead when you get the urge replace that with something else whether it's you getting down and doing 30 push-ups whether it's you going for a walk whether it's you phoning a friend and talking to them whether it's you working on a skill you've been trying to develop whether it's you creating a video Whatever It Is have another habit and use that to replace the craving now the second think falls into the point I just
• 03:30 - 04:00 said which is pick a battle that you can win this is where I explained the first part of my video where I told you you don't have to quit porn all around to get rid of the addiction see if you say I will quit forever that's a hard battle to win and so the urge intensifies because now you're putting the pressure on yourself that I can't do this ever again instead with a pornography addiction you can moderate it you can't do that with any other addiction that substance abuse such as nicotine or alcohol because there's actual physical draw with pornography it's different
• 04:00 - 04:30 it's a mental game so you can set a new guideline for yourself you say okay I am allowed to do it every night at 9 p.m. but what that does to you is that all day you're winning the battle you wake up at let's say 8:00 a.m. you go to school you come back you do homework you went to the gym you worked on a scale you went to work all day you were productive all day you avoided the urge all day you won the battle and then 9:00 p.m. rolls around and you're allowed to do it now what happens is that because you make it okay at 9:00 p.m. because you're winning the battle every single
• 04:30 - 05:00 day what you'll notice is that eventually when 9:00 p.m. rolls around you'll be like huh do I really feel like doing it right now and a lot of times you'll actually skip it and you might wait until next day 9:00 p.m. I watched this video from healthy gamer GG and he said this with substance abuse the longer you wait the stronger the withdrawals become because it's actual physical need it's something your body depends on right if you are addicted to alcohol and you stop drinking alcohol like this you'll have cramps you might have seizures you'll physically feel is shoes with your body with porn there is
• 05:00 - 05:30 no withdrawal as you wait the craving does intensify right away but eventually it decreases and there is people that watch pornography when they feel like doing it maybe two or three times a week and those people are probably not watching this video because to them it's not a problem it doesn't control them and they don't see it as an addiction that's why if you moderate it if you set a battle you can win if you set a time where you're allowed to do it and on some days you'll actually skip it because you'll notice hm maybe I don't want to do it it'll become something that doesn't control control you anymore
• 05:30 - 06:00 cuz you'll prioritize everything else in your day and you'll find a purpose for yourself and that is the third step find a purpose Find meaning in your life I'll give you an example boxers before they have a fight they have a six week camp and a lot of them they don't have sex for that six week now some of them usually have sex every single day maybe they have a wife or a partner or they just have a bunch of girls around but when that six week Camp starts they stop having sex completely and they do this because they know that semen retention will increase per performance and allow
• 06:00 - 06:30 them to win the fight so because they have such a strong purpose fighting that urge of not having sex becomes easy their purpose is they have a boxing fight coming up and they really want to win this fight and so that purpose that goal that they have completely outweighs the urge for them to have sex or to bust a n and so you need to find some sort of purpose in your life that outweighs the urge for you to watch pornography and to masturb it now that doesn't have to be something completely lifechanging but it can be a project that you're working on a business and on online business that
• 06:30 - 07:00 you're trying to start maybe you got into a new sport and you're really trying to increase your performance and your level in this sport maybe your goal is to talk to women and you know that you'll be more confident if you stop watching pornography you need to find something that gives you meaning something that gives you purpose and let that outweigh the earth now a big big big big big thing when it comes to stopping addiction and being on the right path for yourself is accountability having people around you having a proper environment that supports that for you where you have the proper resources you can seek advice you can provide advice you can grow not only
• 07:00 - 07:30 alone as a person but with like-minded individuals around you and so that's why I've created my private Community called the S-Class probably heard me talk about this before I have all my workout programs there we do weekly calls we have a private Community connecting you with like-minded individuals it's the Hub that I've created for us individuals that are on self-improvement that want to become the best version of ourselves to be a part of this way I can give you all the resources you need you can have calls with me you can connect with like-minded individuals and whatever it is you're struggling with we can help you with that it actually just launched
• 07:30 - 08:00 so you can click the link my bio down below or the pined comment at the top that being said I hope this video helped at least one person or gave some clarification on this whole pornography thing to one person that struggles with it if you enjoyed this video please make sure to leave a like subscribe and turn those post notifications on so you know exactly when I upload that's it I will see you in the next video