One Rough Childhood-Bryson

Summary

Highlights

• Bryson shares his rough upbringing in Maui, detailing the community's attitude towards outsiders. 🌺
• He recounts the severe abuse and the tragic loss of his sister at the hands of his mother's boyfriend. 😢
• The trauma deeply affected Bryson, leading him to a life of rebellion and substance abuse. 🚧
• Despite numerous setbacks, he strives for recovery, motivated by the potential for a better life. 💪
• The interview showcases Bryson's stark honesty and willingness to share his story, highlighting the importance of empathy and understanding. 💬

Key Takeaways

• Bryson's childhood was marked by trauma, witnessing abuse, and experiencing loss, shaping his life's path. 🌧️
• His candid account reveals the impact of early trauma on his mental health and subsequent rebellious nature. 🌪️
• The cycle of addiction took hold of Bryson in his teens, and he continues battling with substance use today. 💔
• Despite everything, Bryson holds a glimmer of hope and seeks rehabilitation, showing resilience. 🌟
• Bryson's strength and openness about his past serves as a stark reminder of the lingering effects of trauma and addiction. 🔍

Overview

Chapters

• 00:00 - 01:00: Introduction and Background The chapter titled 'Introduction and Background' features a conversation with Bryson about his upbringing. Bryson shares that he was born and raised on the island of Maui in Hawaii. He reflects on the uniqueness of his upbringing, noting that he did not realize how different it was compared to life on the mainland until he moved away. He describes the community as very tight-knit and mentions a general reluctance towards outsiders.
• 01:00 - 03:00: Early Childhood and Family This chapter explores the early childhood and family life of the narrator, highlighting a mix of positive and negative experiences. The narrator reflects on how these early experiences, characterized by both challenges and trauma, have significantly shaped his current identity and life decisions. Despite the difficulties faced, these formative years are acknowledged as instrumental in guiding him to become the person he is today.
• 03:00 - 05:00: Abuse and Neglect The chapter titled 'Abuse and Neglect' discusses the narrator's upbringing with a single mother who had them at 16. While the mother did not struggle with substance abuse, she was attracted to men involved in criminal activities such as gangbanging and robbery. This attraction to problematic men also led to her relationship with the narrator's father, though they were never married.
• 05:00 - 07:00: Tragic Events and Their Impact The chapter titled 'Tragic Events and Their Impact' delves into personal hardships experienced by the narrator's mother during their early life. At 16, she was already a single mother as the narrator's father was sent away. This period was marked by challenges, especially as the mother navigated the dating scene while raising a child. The narrator recalls witnessing instances of her mother enduring physical abuse, but also acknowledges her persistent efforts to improve their situation despite the adversities.
• 07:00 - 09:00: Legal and Prison System The chapter discusses the significant role that the narrator's grandparents played in their early life due to their mother's busy schedule and youthful lifestyle. The narrator's mother, who was very young, often worked two jobs or went out to party, leading to the narrator spending a lot of time with their grandparents. The mother eventually became pregnant as a teenager, highlighting the responsibilities she faced at a young age.
• 09:00 - 13:00: Personal Struggles and Recovery The chapter titled 'Personal Struggles and Recovery' delves into family dynamics, particularly focusing on the narrator's sister Shila, who was born in June 1996. The narrator was born in September 1994, establishing a timeline for the family's experiences. The chapter touches on a significant family event where the sister's father separates from the family. During this challenging period, the mother begins a new relationship with a man named Peter Pyon, suggesting a pivot point in their family life. This chapter likely explores themes of personal struggles, adaptation, and the journey towards recovery amidst familial changes.
• 13:00 - 15:00: Current Life and Reflections The chapter titled 'Current Life and Reflections' delves into a harrowing account of a manipulative relationship where one partner, while being financially supported through college by the other, was secretly subjecting her dependents to severe mistreatment. Despite her efforts to maintain the household and cover educational expenses, the partner exploited the situation by neglecting his responsibilities, instead inflicting sexual and physical abuse, as well as severe neglect, on those he was supposed to care for. This grim reality unfolds against a backdrop of assumed domestic dependability and the violation of trust within a supposed protective environment.
• 15:00 - 19:00: Challenges with Addiction and Attempts at Recovery The chapter discusses the challenges faced with addiction and attempts at recovery. It includes a personal account of someone dealing with the presence of drug-addicted friends in their home, and the impact it had on family dynamics, particularly highlighting an incident when the individual's father snapped. A significant moment mentioned is the protagonist begging their mother not to leave for her second job, which in hindsight was a critical indicator of the underlying issues and turmoil they were experiencing.
• 19:00 - 23:00: Family and Future Aspirations In this chapter, a traumatic event is discussed involving a family member working at a fast-food restaurant on Halloween night. The chapter hints at a violent incident where someone snapped, leading to a horrific outcome involving another family member. This experience seems to deeply affect the family's dynamics and possibly influences their future aspirations, leaving an impact on their emotional state and future decisions.
• 23:00 - 25:00: Conclusion and Closing Remarks The chapter recounts a traumatic experience from the narrator's early childhood, specifically when they were three years old. The event is significant enough to have left a lasting impact, causing the narrator to suffer from PTSD. They discuss how such profound incidents can imprint on memory, unlike ordinary memories from that age, which are often forgotten. The chapter emphasizes the enduring nature of memories associated with impactful events.

One Rough Childhood-Bryson Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 so Bryson uh where'd you grow up where you from um I'm born and raised on the island of Maui in Hawaii oh wow yes sir what was it like growing up there um you know I didn't realize how different it was from what we call the mainland until I moved out here uh but I mean very tight very tightnit you know very tightnit yeah they they don't they don't like Outsiders there do they they don't like Outsiders and honestly they don't
• 00:30 - 01:00 even like each other you know what was your childhood like um my childhood had a lot of ups and downs um you know I'd be lying if I said that it was the most worst childhood ever but it was filled with a lot of trauma that has impacted me today and uh you know kind of guided me to become the man that I am and the decisions that I've made you know um I grew up with a
• 01:00 - 01:30 single mom pretty much she had me when she was 16 years old uh my mom never had a problem with drugs or alcohol but she had a problem with having an attraction to guys that were gang banging smoking dope robbing houses you know and um she had a problem with men huh she had a problem with men yes she did and uh so you know that's how she met my father uh they never married or anything like that
• 01:30 - 02:00 and by the time she was pregnant my dad was sent away you know um but yeah so 16 years old she had me and um in the beginning of my life it was kind of uh it's kind of rough seeing her go through the whole dating scene like I do remember a lot of things her getting beat up and [ __ ] like that you know uh but I can honestly say she did everything to make it work you know
• 02:00 - 02:30 um my grandparents played a big role in my life they were there when you know my mom was working two jobs or when she was off and wanted to go and party at the bar and [ __ ] like that cuz she was still very young I was always sent to my grandparents you know um my mom eventually ended up getting pregnant when she was I want to say 17 going going on 18 with my little
• 02:30 - 03:00 sister and uh you know my sister Shila was born she was born in June of 96 yeah and I was born September of 94 um she actually ended up separating from her father and uh in the midst of her separating from my sister's father she started dating this guy named Peter Peter Pyon and and uh my mom was working
• 03:00 - 03:30 two jobs she was paying for him to go to college she was doing his schoolwork and all she asked in return is for him to watch us and take care of the whole housing situation clean the house do laundry [ __ ] like that you know and uh little did she know that while she was dating him he was putting us through sexual abuse he was putting us through physical abuse um severe neglect
• 03:30 - 04:00 bringing around druggy friends that were smoking dope in the same room as me and my baby sister and uh you know eventually one day I don't know exactly what it was bro but he snapped uh my mom was at work she told me that you know when this happened when she went to go to her second job at night she told me that I was begging her not to go you know and she said I should have seen the signs because that's not normal you know were begging me not to
• 04:00 - 04:30 go to work and uh yeah she went to work it was Halloween night um she was working at Jack in a box and uh I don't know what it was he must have got a bad batch or something like that but he he [ __ ] snapped dude uh couldn't get my sister to stop crying so he picked her up by her feet and repeatedly smashed her head into the wall until she was not making any noise movements anything and
• 04:30 - 05:00 this happened right in front of me I was 3 years old when this happened do you remember this yeah I do vividly I have a pretty bad PTSD from it I'm sure three three years old is probably an age where you can probably remember something that yeah I feel like I feel like the reason why I remember it is because it had such a big impact you know I'd be lying if I said I remember playing with toys and [ __ ] when I was three but that's the kind of stuff you don't really remember yeah and uh you know before that happened uh I do
• 05:00 - 05:30 remember some of the things that he used to do to us he used to um make me swallow coins and he would do that so that he could tell my mom like oh you know I caught him swallowing coins again and then my mom would be upset at me you know uh we found out in the end he told my mother that the reason why he killed my sister is because he couldn't stand how much she loved us you know so I feel like he had some sort of Vengeance against us you know and we were just
• 05:30 - 06:00 innocent little kids um he used to fill up the bathtub with scolding hot water and he used to take me and my little sister's heads and put our heads underneath the water and then lift us up and let us catch our breath and put our heads underneath the water you know and when I came out here to California a lot of people are like you're from Hawaii dude you must be a [ __ ] Surfer and I'm like dude I hate the water you know like never got into it was always scared of it since then how old were you in your sister when he murdered her uh she
• 06:00 - 06:30 was a year and a half 16 months exactly you yeah you were three or something yeah and I was three years old yep and uh you know the neighbors ended up hearing the noises and called the police and when the police came he was acting shock and told the police that I push my sister down the stairs that they needed to get in contact with my mother immediately cuz he's so worried about my sister and he was giving her CP H CPR
• 06:30 - 07:00 and [ __ ] and he turned his back for one second and I pushed her down the stairs cuz she wasn't sharing one of my toys or some [ __ ] like that you know and uh yeah you know they medevaced my sister to the main hospital that we have in Hawaii which is on the island of aahu and um I think that it happened on October 31st and the next day she was pronounced dead bro she was on like some
• 07:00 - 07:30 hardcore heavy duty life uh preservative machines and stuff like that but it just it didn't work you know by the time police got there she had a [ __ ] big ass hole in her head that was just mush you know it's very surprising that she wasn't Dead on Arrival um it's horrible yeah it was uh it was messed up man it was really messed up and uh you know I kind kind of grew like desensitized to telling the
• 07:30 - 08:00 story you know and uh I'll get to that like a little bit later on in life on why I became the sensitized to telling it but you know like really thinking back about it and actually talking about it like that had such a huge role on the person that I decided to not decided to but the person that I became you know rebellious and stuff like that um FBI
• 08:00 - 08:30 came in to do an investigation and that's when we found out that I was being sexually assaulted as well as my sister you know uh my brain completely blocked that part out I honestly can't tell you exactly what was going on but he could they could tell that uh certain parts of our body had been [ __ ] with you know um when the FBI came in and did their investigation they noticed that we had a two-story apartment so when you walked in was very high
• 08:30 - 09:00 ceilings I don't know how they noticed it but they noticed that there was a crack in our ceiling and as they investigated it closer they seen hair stuck in the cracks and come to find out what he would do is he would grab us and he would throw us as hard as he could into the air so that our heads would boom hit the ceiling like that whenever we were crying cuz then it would knock us out you know what I mean and he got convicted of murdering
• 09:00 - 09:30 your sister yeah so he got convicted of I forget exactly what the charge is but this is this is the worst part I mean he got convicted of pretty much murdering my sister exactly that um and uh when he got convicted and sentenced to prison he patched up with a certain gang and they protected him when he went into prison he uh started telling people that he murdered
• 09:30 - 10:00 another guy and that's why he was there I don't know how they didn't check [ __ ] paperwork or whatever how it was back in the late 90s but he skated through it like that and uh you know at six years of him serving prison time um cuz he was sentenced to life with the possibility of parole after 20 years after 6 years of prison time he was viewed as a like a star inmate I
• 10:00 - 10:30 guess you could say you know like an inmate that abided by the rules didn't cause any problems and stuff and they pushed for early release on good behavior yeah he got only six years for only six years serving time so what had to happen was my mom had a lawyer and her lawyer advised us I advised her that
• 10:30 - 11:00 we go get a petition sign so you know the island already is so small as it is and you know God bless my mom having to relive this [ __ ] every year but at six years when they wanted to give him early release we had to go around the island door too and tell the story over and over and over again till we got I believe it was a thousand signatures so you know she had to relive that tell the story over and over again
• 11:00 - 11:30 and then now like everybody knows what's going on you know and it was just messed up so they denied his early release and at 9 years it came up and we went it came up for early release again we went to petition we did the petition got the same amount of signatures but they released him so 9 years of prison time for murdering a infant yeah
• 11:30 - 12:00 yeah yeah um it's horrible it is you know and it's very unfortunate that uh that the system works like that out there in Hawaii you know and that's why you can talk about it so easily because you've told the story a thousand times yeah twice yep and uh you know it's just really unfortunate um so he had to abide by one rule he was 86 from the state of Hawaii not allowed back he was to do his
• 12:00 - 12:30 parole with his sister in Alaska and he was never allowed to come back to the island and uh just last year my mom called me and she's like what are you doing I'm like nothing she's like I need you to sit down she's [ __ ] crying frantic I'm like what's going on she's all like Peter just got arrested on aahu and they called me because they got to notify me when he when he gets arrested on island she's like I don't know why the [ __ ] he's back here in Hawaii but he's not supposed to be and that parole
• 12:30 - 13:00 violation right there was supposed to be it you [ __ ] up on that you're gone forever they released him yeah so yeah it's unfortunate uh so he's a free man now free man you know and that is uh God Bless America God Bless America you know that's one of the one of the situations at which I wish Hawaii
• 13:00 - 13:30 uh prison system had the same Politics as California's prison system you know because if he would have walked into California with that charge he wouldn't have been able to serve those nine years cuz he'd be dead yeah he would have [ __ ] killed him you know um so anyways I mean you want me to move past that keep going telling you what's going on or yeah what's going on what happened to your eye uh so with
• 13:30 - 14:00 that um I was walking at so we got one big mall on our Island and I was walking in the mall with my girlfriend just a normal day broad daylight you know uh spending time with my first girlfriend that I've ever had I believe this is freshman year yeah freshman year and I'm walking with her holding her hand and out of nowhere I realize that I'm on the ground my face is [ __ ] hurting I can't see out my eye my girlfriend's
• 14:00 - 14:30 [ __ ] screaming and crying I see that there's blood all over the place um and come to find out somebody from the rival gang of where my father is from wanted to get his hands on my father and couldn't and uh ended up seeing me at the mall and [ __ ] stabbed me in my face from behind I believe he was 34 years old at the time yeah
• 14:30 - 15:00 so I got rushed to the hospital they [ __ ] uh did their best to like bandage up everything to stop the bleeding because I was bleeding profusely and uh I got metac to Queen capani that's on aahu the main hospital and they had to take out my eye they had to cauterize some arteries that got you know punctured and [ __ ] like that and uh I mean long story short that that guy ended up getting arrested that same very
• 15:00 - 15:30 day he wasn't able to run and um my father ended up crossing paths with him in prison and killing him you know it was just a really [ __ ] up situation on me getting like how do I put it getting caught in crossfire cuz you were you were like 14 I was 14 years old I was a [ __ ] kid freshman freshman and I wasn't even into like gang banging and [ __ ] at that time
• 15:30 - 16:00 I was still just like a normal kid you know at that age like I was racing motocross almost became professional uh when I was around like 17 got sponsored by Troy Lee Designs himself personally uh came out to Maui flew my family all around to race and [ __ ] so I was a good kid you know until you lost your eye I lost my eye and that made it very hard man made it very hard because I started getting [ __ ] bullied in school you couldn't do Motocross I couldn't do
• 16:00 - 16:30 Motocross I lost my depbt perception I could barely I had to relearn how to walk I had to relearn like everything it was so [ __ ] hard man it was really hard you know um my mom was devastated she was devastated and she was pissed too at the same time you know um and she felt like it was her fault because you know I didn't not only did I not deserve that but she felt like
• 16:30 - 17:00 because that's who my dad was she felt kind of guilty you know because like she should have protected me from that type of situation but there's nothing that she could have done you know we didn't know that there was some sort of [ __ ] going on with him and people wanted to kill him like I never kept in contact with my father while he was locked up you know so yeah I mean uh my dad ended up getting pared out I mean not pared my
• 17:00 - 17:30 bad my dad ended up maxing out when I turned 19 so right before I turned 19 my dad ended up maxing out um by the age of 19 I'm in rehab for the first time I entered rehab at 18 years old uh I was homeless on the island I had a problem with smoking crystal meth and um yeah I was heading down a really bad path really fast uh I was smoking oxies
• 17:30 - 18:00 that's when the oxy 30s you know that whole epidemic hit and the painkillers was coming out this is in 2012 and uh I got put on probation for my first charge which was um assault of a Family household member I got into a fight with uh somebody from my family at home and I couldn't stop smoking dope so I had to go to rehab because my probation officer was going to violate me I went to rehab my dad pared out you
• 18:00 - 18:30 know my mom thought it would be a good idea for my birthday my 19th birthday to bring him up to the rehab you know to see me and stuff like that help like not help but celebrate it with me you know uh so I seen my dad for the first time especially as a man you know I only seen him over like video screens that the church would do back then when we would do uh calls to prison and [ __ ] and uh I remember specifically this day because he was walking down from the
• 18:30 - 19:00 parking lot to where I was sitting on the table where they did visitations at this rehab it's called a loha house and uh he had his arm around my mom and you know I hugged him and stuff like that and we greeted each other and we sat down and I told him look Dad I just got to tell you straight up I'm not okay with you putting your armor around my mom don't ever think that you guys are going to get together because that's not GNA happen and right there the whole situation flipped he he looked at me in my face and he said you think you can
• 19:00 - 19:30 disrespect me like that just because you're my son he said tonight I'm going to come back and I'm going to put a [ __ ] bullet in your head and he walked away so the beginning of my relationship with my father was not good at all you know um wow yeah not good at all is it cool if I hit this absolutely cool yeah that was what age that was that was 18
• 19:30 - 20:00 turning 19 and you are how old now huh how old are you now I'm 18 oh right now I'm 30 I just turned 30 in September last year you came to California when I came to California when I was 20 turning 21 and I've been kind of stuck out here ever since um I came out here to try and get away from the island get away from the relationships that I had out there cuz they were very toxic and the drug use
• 20:00 - 20:30 you know um while coming out here and doing that I ended up making friends in treatment who are from California who could get their hands on drugs that were way stronger for way cheaper everything's so expensive back home on the islands you know and uh I got introduced to Black to heroin um within two years of me being up here in the mainland I got introduced to the needle I started shooting up heroin and crystal meth [Laughter]
• 20:30 - 21:00 and uh you know I want to say that honestly fear has kept me sober for a long time when I first came up here cuz I didn't know where the [ __ ] I was you know I'm just a kid from Hawaii on an island and what we know of California is Compton Easy E [ __ ] shoot you for the wrong shirt color you know that's what I honestly thought it was so I was really scared of being homeless you know [ __ ] up and them kicking me out of a rehab and that's that's what kept me sober for a while and I ended up meeting
• 21:00 - 21:30 a girl out here from Englewood and uh she's a local you know and we got together in rehab started dating and uh you know she had family she had connects out here and she was also normal to the motel hopping and [ __ ] like that so I got used to being homeless out here and uh to be honest that's what that's the reason why I'm so desensitized to telling my sister's story cuz I've been in rehab so much times
• 21:30 - 22:00 that you know when I meet a new therapist and they ask you about your trauma and [ __ ] like that I have to tell it over and over again you know and uh yeah my addiction's just been a progressive [ __ ] hell man it's been a progressive hell I've had some success I'm not going to lie you know I did personal training Oceanside I was making good money put together some good amount of sober time
• 22:00 - 22:30 but I don't know what it is man I feel like Uh something's missing that keeps taking me back out you know and you're still using today I'm still using today um have a very bad addiction to fentanyl fentol is my number one drug of choice uh I also have a very bad addiction to crack cocaine uh I smoke meth when it's around I don't buy it because you know everybody's smoking it so but the uppers are something that a lot of fentanyl
• 22:30 - 23:00 addicts will use just to kind of keep them awake I do uppers specifically so I can do more fentanyl right um when fentanyl first really hit the scene and was big in 2019 uh they had stuff that was coming out here in California that you was take you take one hit and you [ __ ] die you know and that's when I got addicted to it it's either my tolerance or the
• 23:00 - 23:30 strength is nowhere the same as it was before but yeah that's primarily why I do uppers and honestly too uh I got really bad into smoking crack and [ __ ] like that because when I was homeless out here I was scared to go to sleep at night you know had a couple of bad situations where I fell asleep uh I was homeless under Venice and saoo that bridge right there I was homeless under there for a while that was my first spot
• 23:30 - 24:00 being homeless in La cuz most of my time in California has been in Orange County um and being homeless out there I learned the hard way that you cannot [ __ ] fall asleep around people that are in the streets in Los Angeles anywhere you know that's where I started getting addicted to my uppers yeah um how I had told you I knew somebody that
• 24:00 - 24:30 you did an interview with the reason why I know that person is because they're very active in helping drug addicts get sober and stuff like that yeah yeah pretty yeah and um the reason why I brought him up is because I just crossed paths with him uh you know I crossed paths with him a long time ago I just recently crossed paths with him this holidays and uh I got to meet him his kids his uh his old lady and man like I don't know what it is about that man we
• 24:30 - 25:00 don't have very long conversations but everything he says has a very big impact like you can tell if he knows you're serious about changing your life he'll do everything he can to help you do it you know yeah I've seen pretty do some amazing things he's really solid yeah he's an awesome man man and uh that's why I was saying hopefully tonight I'll be able to see him because you know I'm trying to get into rehab today good for you yeah so I've been making calls and
• 25:00 - 25:30 stuff I was with uh that guy ponytail who connected me with you and he was letting me use his phone I'mma go back over there and finish the phone calls and stuff like that but uh I already made the initial contact you know by the grace of God it happening I'll be able to be back in that little sobriety family that they got going on you know and uh try again good for you can't give up man you know now you're still young yeah yeah I will say that being a
• 25:30 - 26:00 chronic relapser I've lost Hope and Faith over time but I feel like the most frustrating part is the fact that I give in to my cravings when I know that I can get past it cuz I've done it before and I know that there's so much more on the other side that I can do that I want to do you know I want to work with kids and [ __ ] and I just give in every time I want to get high I'm like [ __ ] it you know know I have a hard time dealing
• 26:00 - 26:30 with dealing with emotions as a as a man you know and uh that's just how I've coped with everything drugs yeah how's your mom doing my mom's doing good honestly uh she's back in uh back in the islands yeah um so you're from Maui yeah from Maui yeah and your mom is still there yep y I have a mom a little brother who's 16 H great kid man AP classes about a graduate junior year
• 26:30 - 27:00 looking to go to a college out here in Nevada like amazing kid man and I have my grandmother left in my family the drugs are bad in Maui drugs are horrible out there um the meth is pretty much free and it's very strong cuz the Filipinos make the [ __ ] out there and um the fentol is $500 a gram so if you get addicted to fentol
• 27:00 - 27:30 which I have like a gram a gram and a half uh a day habit you get addicted to fentol out there I mean it takes two three two weeks Max and you're already at the point of [ __ ] stealing from people robbing stores you know because nobody can really keep up with a [ __ ] $500 a day habit as a drug addict with no job you know so
• 27:30 - 28:00 yeah but Mom's all right she's always been holding it together um she works two full-time jobs in the morning she works for the Hyatt and at night she works for the Four Seasons and uh yeah she the house that she owns she owns it completely to herself I had a step out in my life and he was in my life for about 23 years and my mom ended up getting a divorce to him my brother's dad and uh in the divorce she didn't want
• 28:00 - 28:30 half of everything she said leave me the house and I'll pay for the I'll pay for the mortgage my own so you know she's [ __ ] working herself to death and she has Ms but she's she's killing it man yeah Chon what what would you say is the most important lesson you've learned in your life
• 28:30 - 29:00 the most important lesson that I've learned in my life is um oh man I'm going to have to say at the end of the day uh you're by yourself and you have to fa you have to face your problems alone you know even having family support and stuff like that uh to over come problems and stuff like that this is just my
• 29:00 - 29:30 experience um I have to I had to muster up enough strength to you know trudge through the problems that I have made it through you know because I can honestly say that I have been um enabled as an addict's son and uh the enabling has stunted my growth and has kept me sick all this time it's been 12 years of homelessness
• 29:30 - 30:00 and addiction 12 years yeah all right Bryson thank you so much for sharing your story thank you thank you for letting me do this I really appreciate the opportunity I wish you lots of luck with with pretty yeah I appreciate that yeah good luck right on brother thanks man Even though soft white underbelly consists of a lot of videos It's really
• 30:00 - 30:30 still a photography project to me and if you appreciate the photography sometimes it's difficult to enjoy it when it's scrolling down the screen which is the only option I had in this horizontal format on uh on YouTube so last year we came out with the first softw underbelly book which is a collection of the best portraits from the thousands of interviews I've done each portrait in this book is accompanied by an interesting quote from the person's interview oh my God there's
• 30:30 - 31:00 [Applause] more wow these aren't as bad as I thought I look like a witch I will not be reprinting this book when it sells out so once it's gone it's gone for good you can order yours at softw under. org $125 150 for a sign copy and thank you for watching