Secret life of 4-year-olds: Fascinating facts | Full Episode
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Summary
Explore a fascinating episode offering a unique glimpse into the lives and interactions of twelve four-year-olds as they navigate friendship, conflict, and emotional regulation in a school setting. Cameras and microphones capture every whisper and interaction, providing insight into childhood development. The episode focuses on language skills, emotional expression, and the roles kids play in friendships and group dynamics. With teachers and scientists observing, we witness the children's capability to form bonds, resolve conflicts, and the lessons they learn through play and interaction.
Highlights
Watching four-year-olds navigate their social world is like watching a cute reality TV show! 📺
Jack and Tia's tug-of-war over a toy shows they’re learning to share (or not)! 🧸
Theo's quest to befriend Tyler reminds us how persistent childhood friendships can be! 🤝
The kids’ reaction to winning and losing reveals much about early emotional development! 🏆😭
The grand finale of getting presents versus pegs—showing how kids handle disappointment! 🎁😮
Key Takeaways
Four-year-olds are like little language sponges, soaking in words and using them to navigate their social world! 🗣️
Kids experience big feelings over small events, but they’re just learning to handle emotions! 😤😭
Friendship is a learning curve, even at this young age, with unique dynamics at play! 👦🏻👧🏾
Playground politics can be intense; kids experiment with rules and fairness! ⚖️
Emotion regulation and social interaction are being learned and tested every day! 📚
Overview
In this delightful episode, the world of four-year-olds unfolds as they introduce themselves, engage in play, and establish friendships. The classroom, monitored by cameras, is a hub of childhood development where children experience language growth and social interaction. Teachers Simon and Kate, alongside scientific observers, offer insights into the dynamics and behaviors of children this age, revealing their innocence and raw emotion.
Children like Jack and Tia navigate the art of sharing, while others like Theo endeavor to make friends, showing the importance of communication and persistence. The episode captures raw childhood exchanges and disputes, reflecting on how these experiences will serve as foundations for future emotional and social intelligence.
With highlights like the relay race, the 'stay on your chair' challenge, and final gift evaluations, this episode is not just entertaining but educational. It underscores the importance of play, the challenges in learning emotional regulation, and the hilarious yet poignant moments that define early childhood social life.
Chapters
00:00 - 05:00: Introduction and Meeting the Children The chapter introduces the theme of childhood, emphasizing the significance of early years in shaping one's future. It begins with a discussion about the importance of six-year-olds and their developmental stage. An analogy is drawn to the presidency of the USA, highlighting the potential and importance of this age group.
05:00 - 10:00: Language Development and Social Interaction This chapter explores the critical stage of children's development focusing primarily on language and social interaction. It takes place in a unique school environment where children aged four to six are observed to understand how their current learning serves as a foundation for their future adult lives. The environment is equipped with cameras and microphones to provide an immersive look into their interactions and development.
10:00 - 15:00: Gender Dynamics and Competition This chapter explores the dynamics of gender and competition in a setting involving film-making or possibly a documentary about children. There is a focus on the intricate details and emotional responses as children encounter one another for the first time. The transcript snippet suggests a setting with an appreciative or celebratory audience (Applause), depicting real, raw emotions captured during these interactions. Such encounters potentially highlight how gender plays a role in competitive or collaborative environments from a young age.
15:00 - 20:00: Forming Friendships and Social Challenges This chapter delves into the intricacies of forming friendships and the social challenges faced by individuals. The transcript gives us a glimpse into the lives of four-year-olds, hinting at the wonder and imagination they possess as we overhear mentions of their mothers, Christmas, and the tooth fairy. It's a peek into how children interpret and discuss significant aspects of their social world.
20:00 - 30:00: Individual Personalities and Family Influences Twelve four-year-olds are introduced, meeting for the first time under the care of two teachers, Kate and Simon. The children discuss their impending enrollment in school and share their interests in playing and Disney films, highlighting their individual personalities and family influences.
30:00 - 40:00: Group Activities and Emotional Regulation The chapter titled 'Group Activities and Emotional Regulation' focuses on the role of treasure hunting activities in childhood development. Scientists observe children engaging in these activities, noting that many of the children are on the cusp of starting school. This new experience offers them significant peer interaction, which is something new for most of them. The chapter highlights how these group activities serve to 'wake their bodies up' and prepare them for upcoming social and educational experiences.
40:00 - 50:00: Resolving Conflicts and Sharing The chapter discusses the importance of language in establishing and maintaining relationships among children. It highlights that at the age of four, girls generally have a linguistic advantage over boys, being about five months ahead in language skills on average, which may disadvantage some boys.
50:00 - 60:00: Handling Disappointment and Expressing Emotions The chapter titled 'Handling Disappointment and Expressing Emotions' deals with social interactions among children. In the morning, as the day begins, the children quickly start claiming toys for themselves. Both Tia and Jack are interested in the same toy, leading to a disagreement on who it belongs to. This scenario sets the stage for exploring how children handle disappointment and express their emotions during such conflicts.
60:00 - 70:00: Conclusion and Looking Forward The chapter discusses a conversation between young children, Jackie and another child, who are having a disagreement about sharing. Jackie repeats a demand to 'give it back,' while the mediator suggests discussing their issues as a solution. The narrative highlights the challenge of negotiating sharing among very young children, with a suggestion that this is a complex task at the age of four. There is a sense of agreement and disagreement on whether sharing is beneficial, emphasizing the simplicity yet difficulty of inculcating sharing in a child's mind.
Secret life of 4-year-olds: Fascinating facts | Full Episode Transcription
00:00 - 00:30 [Music] [Music] like six-year-olds who cares they're at a pivotal age do you like mine don't lag it's not funny this is where futures are formed this is the president of the usa this is a
00:30 - 01:00 unique opportunity to see the most crucial stage of a child's development what they're learning now is the blueprint for adult life these children have come from all over the country to a school where every corner has been rigged with cameras and wired for sound yep okay bye-bye being immersed in the world of these four five and six year olds seeing their development it's the most extraordinary
01:00 - 01:30 experience i actually have film and they love it [Applause] goodness sake with unprecedented access to every tassel every whisper [Music] and all the raw emotions as these children meet for the very first time i love you
01:30 - 02:00 we eavesdrop on their secret lives this week the four-year-olds if you care my mum [Music] christmas and the two fairies [Music]
02:00 - 02:30 hi it's a girl today twelve four-year-olds are meeting for the very first time hi tyler hello hello hello here they'll be looked after by two teachers kate and simon i'm going to school in september so am i i like playing jessa i like disney films
02:30 - 03:00 i like treasure hunting watching every moment are scientists specializing in childhood development many of these children are just months away from starting school for the first time and for most of them having this much contact with their peers will be a totally new experience for them all right everyone we're going to wake our bodies up
03:00 - 03:30 [Music] to establish and maintain relationships one of the key tools that children need is language and at four the average girl tends to be five months ahead of the average boy in terms of their language skills shall i lead the way this can put some boys at a disadvantage in their
03:30 - 04:00 social interactions [Music] as the morning gets underway the children waste no time in marking their territory and a toy catches tia and jack's eye i thought no i don't have it for her i did i did [Music]
04:00 - 04:30 jackie's repeating her arguments give it back go back give it back you look like you're having a bit of a disagreement yes if they're not gonna let go they're gonna have to talk it through and that's a big ask at four years old do you think may sharing is a good idea yeah yeah no so how can we make it no no no i don't know
04:30 - 05:00 charlotte has found a solution for jack and tia another wheelbarrow look what charlotte's brought over for you [Music] are you a good boy or a naughty boy good boy three little pigs he's definitely a lovable rogue i mean who can resist
05:00 - 05:30 that little face but well that angelic face yeah the little angel that he isn't jack lives in twickenham with parents kelly and jason and his two brothers jack is the youngest of three boys and i think with having older brothers to get something you've got you know fight for it you gotta sort of stand your ground you are so rude he's quite stubborn but he can be really loving and he's very very
05:30 - 06:00 affectionate what do you love about your mummy i think it's me and cuddle his language could be better and when he doesn't like something he'll just he does that great grunt and growl does frustrate him if he can't find the word i do we're trying to get him to tell us what's the matter what you want what's wrong what's simon got on his head [Applause]
06:00 - 06:30 it's the afternoon and the children are getting ready for a relay race [Music] competition is motivating it's exciting but it's also a great learning experience nathaniel can you stop pushing at him please well he was pushing me jack and nathaniel both want to be captain now first of all boys boys listening sit down ace sit down ace
06:30 - 07:00 [Music] all right my team captains are going to be charlotte over here and jack [Music] over here jack nathaniel is frustrated it's become directed towards ace but it's nothing to do with ace
07:00 - 07:30 [Music] so jack would you like to choose someone first who's going to be in your team charlotte who are you going to choose do you think that we're going to end up with a boys team and a girl's team i suppose that was a bit inevitable given the way that children of this age self-segregate on the basis of gender if it falls off your head what do you have to do you can't walk if it's in your hand and
07:30 - 08:00 you're not allowed to hold it on your head okay all right are you ready on your marks get set go boys cheer for jackson go jack don't hold it jack don't hold it a few seconds into the race and the boys seem to have forgotten the rules the rules as far as the girls are concerned are very important they're
08:00 - 08:30 aware of the stigma of breaking a rule whereas the boys are trying to navigate their way around the rules they just want to win [Music] [Music] [Music]
08:30 - 09:00 who should have won the race why because the boys were cheating who cheats more boys or girls probably boys why is that of course they're more like they're more like boyish i know the girls are never gonna win the boys
09:00 - 09:30 the boys always have bigger brains the girls have smaller really yep yeah next time you're gonna win girls theo's taken a more sympathetic approach to tears disappointment that boy's really nice toys and he thinks we're gonna win next time he's really nice
09:30 - 10:00 how does it feel when you lose a race [Music] what does that mean sad tia lives with mum cheryl dad glenn and little sister emilia rose in chatham you're not ever gonna win i am well i'm taking lots of queens t is a character she's definitely confident very outgoing you feel her
10:00 - 10:30 presence the most of anyone in the house what makes you cross when i don't get my own way this is how i disappear [Music] do you always do whatever adults tell you to because she sees something going on that she thinks is wrong tear will pick you up on it she will pick up that you that's not right you shouldn't be doing that this is my castle she's really forceful actually and i think sometimes
10:30 - 11:00 it's a little bit overpowering for other kids because she is quite full-on [Music] tyr is still licking her wounds after losing the race jack's victory celebrations don't seem to be helping [Music] this is a difficult situation because in a way jack has a good justification for being really
11:00 - 11:30 happy because they've won the race [Music] on the other hand too much celebration in front of the losing team is actually a bit anti-social jack come here tia decides to confront jack about his behavior that's really not a nice thing to say and i don't know why you're a horrible boy and i'm clear and and felio [Music]
11:30 - 12:00 [Music] i'm coming after you [Music] let me talk to you no yes but if you don't let me talk to you um
12:00 - 12:30 i'm gonna i'm gonna yeah he has a really nice friend and he told us we were going next time and then we decided he was a really good friend and you're just a horrible friend
12:30 - 13:00 i tried to tell him but he just didn't listen so i just tried tia's language skills are clearly better than jack's but actually it's a little bit harsh of tia because she's attacking him personally i'm just trying to make him a good boy but i tell him and then he's go angry it's really frustrating for jack because you know he is sensitive and he's
13:00 - 13:30 obviously finding this very hurtful and you can imagine what it's like not to have the words yet to be able to defend yourself it's very difficult for him to express what he's feeling inside [Music] [Music] it's a new day
13:30 - 14:00 jack tya and the other four-year-olds are doing their morning warm-up all right now but not everyone wants to take part since he arrived yesterday tyler has kept himself to himself yeah and dad when you come he put me
14:00 - 14:30 and chips please yeah thanks bye he's got a very different style of play title doesn't he yeah he's not into boisterous rough and tumble play is he one of the reasons why we build relationships with each other is because it develops a sense of predictable familiarity around us but you can also seek out familiarity and comfort in physical objects
14:30 - 15:00 and i think that there is a tendency that you can see in tyler to seek out that type of comfort rather than confront the challenges of social interaction tyler come with me come on got to go and stand with the others [Music] what's the best job to have a bus driver door's opening i wouldn't have said he's like your usual four-year-old daughter's pleasant
15:00 - 15:30 so i'll always be slightly different but he'll be the one that you sort of go no that's that's tyler you know i wouldn't have him any other way tyler lives with his mum nikita step dad jamie and little sister hayden 97 96 95 94 93 his attention is obviously fantastic but it's only on what he wants numbers are his thing at first they weren't too sure whether he was autistic because of the counting but now he is a lot better
15:30 - 16:00 tesco's loves tesco's because you ask him where items are and he'll tell you the arm number free timber present what do bus drivers say how many tickets please i don't think tyler feels the pressure of being liked it's in his own bubble you know and he loves it you know he doesn't feel any need to make friends
16:00 - 16:30 as the morning continues tyler still doesn't want to join in but he does attract theo's attention [Music] to you okay [Music]
16:30 - 17:00 um [Music] he has really set his sights on tyler he really wants to be tyler's friend tyler's not giving any warmth to theo when someone is quite cold to us it's always quite an intriguing thing we always want to work out why is it that that person's being called to us i'm to tell you something
17:00 - 17:30 i want to tell you something i'm gonna tell you something i was talking to him and he didn't listen to me he just said he just went just love bosses please talk to you yes and i have a bad dream last night with a wolf going to side to side and our house
17:30 - 18:00 and he comes upstairs and got me [Music] those are badgering other lunches sir i'm scared anymore it's nighttime [Music] i just gonna say i love you [Music] theo has a great love and a great sense of spiritual wisdom about him love is of real high regard in our family and you know we show love we teach about
18:00 - 18:30 them we discuss love a lot only child theo lives with mum lisa a businesswoman and dad freddie a project manager choosing to place him through steiner education was an absolute conscious decision you know like for me one of the most important things for theo is the development of his imagination [Music] astrologically he's a tiger a tiger is a
18:30 - 19:00 very um cautious you know but they they walk sort of gently they're a very elegant being and they could probably be on top of you without you even realizing you know and i guess theo has that very tiger way you know if he wants something he absolutely won't stop until he gets it [Music]
19:00 - 19:30 it's break time and theo and ace are bonding over their abcs [Music] [Music]
19:30 - 20:00 a really important part of making friends is learning not just how to share resources but how to share your ideas as well and that that means seeing things from another person's perspective and that's quite difficult at four years old and in fact a lot of us struggle with that throughout our lives i know i know a song a v d k e b
20:00 - 20:30 a [Music] i got a yogurt on the other side of the playground the girls are also getting to know each other hey guys i've got a great game we can play what how about i spy but i was starfish i suppose my little eye something beginning with i i know i know
20:30 - 21:00 i the letter i like you said a nice bite yes now it's you're going chance yeah i'm a vegan with green umbrella no no you can't tennis you have to go do you have any brothers or sisters no who do you play with at home my teddy what do you play hide and seek teddy since knight hides let's go and get some mud
21:00 - 21:30 in charge at the outside kitchen come on it's an important job but her chefs have deserted her excuse me excuse me the mud's over there i'm putting her now no you're my friend she has a very commanding approach doesn't she do this do that she hasn't learned that she will then have to invite someone into the play you can't tell someone to play with you tia tia come on before you're gonna help me
21:30 - 22:00 get some mud see ya come on chop chop girl a chance here i'm coming now how i'm not fussy you are and i'm gonna go and play with my another friend no play with me oh play with me but you're a bossy she is i'm not fussy you are no i'm not yes you are yes you are you've got to admire it and judge you you know she's a will of steel oh i'm showing you something quickly
22:00 - 22:30 come on here this way hurry hurry [Music] and take a look oh no you don't i am playing with you unable to resolve their argument the girls call on the teacher for advice simon i saw her being busted a minute ago oh what is wrong with that hat did you have a bit of an argument with jazeera yes sir and and she was been pushing to me and
22:30 - 23:00 she said come on come on come on come on come on come on come home we don't want to join him do we because she always says the same thing i am come on come on come on come on come on come on what's a good way to play the good way is to play to not be naughty and to not argue i think do you think friends are important
23:00 - 23:30 why um because if you didn't have a friend you'll be lonely girls is it okay if she plays with you yes i'm fine yeah if she only doesn't be can i don't you know only if you don't be bossy to cheer okay i will never be perfect okay to give daddy a credit it takes a lot to say okay you know maybe i did overdo it and
23:30 - 24:00 i'm going to be slightly less assertive in future can i help you make a coach um no thanks i decided to walk okay so it's turned into a good learning situation because jazia has been able to accept that she may have made a mistake and that's something we all have to learn to do abracadabra alakazoo make sure that purple's blue ding and ring hi i still haven't picked out our dress that's typical isn't it look you see lola has got left on her own now because
24:00 - 24:30 it was never about lola that's not very godmap i don't have one you should do what about cinderella's i hate cinderella what else can i do i'm just gonna watch the bruno okay [Music] everyone can stay in their seats it's the end of the day and the children have been set a challenge if every child can stay in their chair
24:30 - 25:00 while the teachers are out of the room they'll all get a prize but if people move out of the seat will you get a prize no no would you expect a bunch of four-year-olds to stay there well this is gonna be tough for them [Music] oh tears gone jack's gone [Music] so tia jack
25:00 - 25:30 everybody don't tell anybody and um we sit down well we're telling no please don't because [Music] then we will all get into trouble so tia starts off by saying okay we've got shared responsibility if one person gets in trouble we all get in trouble she's clearly grasped that i'm not sure the other kids have i have to don't wish if you tell teachers i won't be your friend if you don't tell the teachers i will be
25:30 - 26:00 your friend oh it's moved very quickly from from a moral argument to a this is all coercion now isn't it really if you tell i'm seeing my mummy my daddy also my granddads and my and my two nannies
26:00 - 26:30 and i'm gonna have it even for christmas and the two fairy what's really fascinating is that as they discuss it so they're making reference to the the people i use that in sort of a broad sense um that they feel are the most important moral authorities in their life those are all people you know that we feel family tooth fairy father christmas these are people who make judgments about our behavior and so the fact that they're part of the
26:30 - 27:00 conversation is very important and if you have helped the teachers i won't even talk to you ever again okay are you going to tell them no i want to no luck you know what i'm i'm not going to be your friend because you're killing them i'm gonna be yours and yeah and yours and yours and yours and yours and yours if you tell them
27:00 - 27:30 i'll be your friend but not the one with the orange but i'm not being your friend no lola i'm not being lonely's friend i want my mommy [Music] i'm gonna be your friend if you want just please i'm being your friend [Music] oh hi here here and jack was not on their
27:30 - 28:00 seats [Music] do you ever tell lies why not because it's sad do you always do what you're told charlotte yeah what kind of a girl are you a good girl [Music] charlotte's not interested in winning the prize well she's been she's interested in in
28:00 - 28:30 the status of being in the right that's damaged the relationship a little bit that's gonna be made out later on we were just so bored seeing that we just wanted to go and play i'm really really sorry but because not everyone stayed on their chairs i can't give you a prize [Music]
28:30 - 29:00 it's halfway through the week and the boys have discovered a shared interest [Music] it's really striking how much children have to achieve at four years old it may look like play but actually
29:00 - 29:30 they're working really really hard and having to learn an awful lot the way that they're communicating with each other the way that they're experimenting and finding things out is really really important for them [Music] who's your favorite superhero a how boy you do different tricks can destroy the bad one [Music]
29:30 - 30:00 your grandma told me that you are a bit like the incredible hulk yes [Music] nathaniel and jack the two boys who are very physically similar in terms of their energy levels they could have a great friendship they could have a great friendship they could have a lot of shared fun what one fun's fun the other
30:00 - 30:30 finds fun [Music] [Music] what makes you angry if somebody doesn't give me anything i turn angry yes i'm a clever clever little boy
30:30 - 31:00 he's strong he's a very strong character oh tell me i can't really snap at him i can't really tell him off because i'm like yeah i was cheeky like that nathaniel lives with mom natalie who works in fashion older sister kelsey and dad kevin a chef from the moment he wakes up he's like tigger okay that's what he is he's a tigger he bounces up until now sharing is that i've got it
31:00 - 31:30 it's mine i don't want to give it to you that's just his way he's just like it's mine because i kicked it why do i have to share it because it's kind nathaniel oh do i do i want to be kind yes you want to be kind of [Music] after a morning of rough and tumble in the playground jack and nathaniel are sitting together over
31:30 - 32:00 and they're lunch cute that i'm gonna tell my [Music] likes mummy nasando's taking jack's dinosaur no you're not you're not gonna punch me you're never gonna punch me yeah
32:00 - 32:30 [Music] there's a thin line between assertion and aggression and at this age children are experimenting finding out where that line is [Music] we're going to make a chili darling
32:30 - 33:00 how can i get the fruit so i can put darling darling tia lola and jazia are in the home corner set up the table i said get up and stuff the table and get the stuff don't worry set up the table make sure it's nice and tight oh my gosh i need to get the dinner ready you can find the clothes if you want i hate doing the ironing [Music]
33:00 - 33:30 tyler's been playing with his buses inside all morning where's my friend to come back but having spent the week trying to befriend him theo is missing his favorite playmate i want to play now do you like tyler are you best friends yeah
33:30 - 34:00 hello my friend is back he's he's tell me he's coming to play with me my friend and wait come on please stop get [Music]
34:00 - 34:30 [Music] come this way have a nice set down [Music] a bit more familiarity with ceo means that it's possible for tyler to engage in a social interaction with ceo which in some ways is quite challenging because they're having that hoop around you and pulling you over i really hope that he takes advantage of all these opportunities that theo is throwing out [Music]
34:30 - 35:00 right theo we can't be pulling people inside the hoop okay i need we can use it as a hula hoop but we can't drag people because it will hurt okay [Music] and we're gonna get dizzy after this hold me [Music] ah we're gonna answer the phone who anybody winks charles and lola have been going down the slide together for the last five minutes tia wants to join in
35:00 - 35:30 okay but the girls won't let her go in here no yes no this whole thing could be traced back to tia's decision to try to create a conspiracy to get people not to say that she got out of a seat i mean you why because i'm i'm at my mid i need to talk to you alone quickly
35:30 - 36:00 okay what should i do if they give it hold on to my back and go down together what should i do it's amazing tears asking nathaniel for advice and that's very unusual for this age yeah i mean i mean normally children seek advice from teachers and and parents she's aware that different people have different points of view i think she must say please can you go behind me no i tried asking nicely but they didn't let me
36:00 - 36:30 they're so rude guys um guys i'm just really sad because you didn't hold onto my back and when i asked nicely you said no well actually because i love lila more i really love she loves me more [Music]
36:30 - 37:00 she said she loved lola someone never said that to me before now [Music]
37:00 - 37:30 together that's what i want to do with them you want to do that with them have you told them that you want to do it with them but they didn't let me it's not fantastic how well she's expressing her emotions yeah a lot of adults wouldn't deal with this situation nearly so well what did they say he's really upset at the moment
37:30 - 38:00 he didn't say please me i hold is that what she needed to have said charlotte yeah tell me to comment join you back now okay funny isn't it that from that big ruckus and now they're best friends amazing how friendships work because it's sad i'm just gonna hold them up and go down just a little bit can i bring this with me
38:00 - 38:30 john go secret way you give a child a new abstract concept to play with such as the concept of a friendship and the natural instinct of a child is to want to prod and explore what that idea means hold on they tug it around a bit see if they can break it and by doing this they learn more about what the concept of friendship means ready steady do you like it yeah isn't it again
38:30 - 39:00 secretly [Music] hello hello hello the four-year-olds are coming to the end of their time together and jack is calling on new friend charlotte for some advice
39:00 - 39:30 my dog is poorly and i'm pulling okay right now let's sign him in okay yeah you haven't been here before what's your dog's name maggie hey i'm a wolf that's whispering okay and what's your name mikey your name yeah is it the same as your
39:30 - 40:00 dog yeah [Music] dinner is actually actually water [Music] yeah squeeze it what do you want to do when you grow up a hairdresser i'm a doctor and say the planet i'll give my dog a bath now he's clean it's lovely to see how jack has developed across the week his language
40:00 - 40:30 skills are improving due to the contact with the other children and research suggests that by six jack's language girls will have caught up with those of other boys and with girls of the same age after lunch jack finds something special to show nathaniel smell this guy no what if we stink a oh look he's sharing the smell of his sock that's really nice things that jack is proud of
40:30 - 41:00 he's on my snort and here's a sock there's a history now in that relationship isn't there there's an expectation of how each other should behave and a bond i think has formed now sit down there [Music] [Laughter] [Music] up in the allotment theo's hard work
41:00 - 41:30 making friends with tyler is paying off please i see you in this one with you come on [Music] on the garden come on walk yay i need to do the plants awesome this is too early a few days ago tyler would have been wandering off and going exploring something on his own and now he's interested in what he is yeah he wants
41:30 - 42:00 to be with leo great to see him you know drawing on the social world as a source of comfort and security not just the the physical patterns have you made a friend here um yeah who um and video [Music] they've got to be weird and then that will be white love is what oh there no one is
42:00 - 42:30 let's go back in [Music] everyone cover your eyes keep them shut keep them shut keep them shut as part of their last day the children are all receiving presents what they don't know is that some presents are better than others okay oh
42:30 - 43:00 i've got some special presents the disappointing present is a task that scientists often use to gain insight into children's ability to regulate their emotions all right so this one says dantia open yours wow amazing okay charlotte this peg it's a really important challenge for
43:00 - 43:30 children and for adults is not to let those feelings that it creates overwhelm you you didn't want a peg did you shut up no i got a really boring thing you can open yours now jack [Music]
43:30 - 44:00 i do see he's taking it much harder than charlotte it's good to show disappointment up to a certain point but if those feelings overwhelm you they can make you do things which are not helpful to recovering from the situation and moving forward are you gonna go back to your thing jack
44:00 - 44:30 [Music] gone off on his own now actually what he hasn't done is he hasn't got angry in it with anybody has he he hasn't struck out [Music] hey jack come here for a second i just got given two extra presents
44:30 - 45:00 i'll help you and i think one of them i think it's for charlotte and i think the other one's for jack and there's some toys in there we'll come back to your seat and open them [Music] [Applause] [Music]
45:00 - 45:30 this week would have felt like an absolute age to these children because they've had so many new experiences they're beginning to learn to regulate their emotions to interact with each other and to understand that other people have feelings too these are lessons that will inform a lot of their future interactions
45:30 - 46:00 [Music] i love you next week new children join the group theo takes a knock in the quiz so team friendship are the winners
46:00 - 46:30 [Music] and the girls vie for lola's attention i'm making a cake for my best friend leila i'm making a cake for my best friend lola ah that's nice of you [Music]