The Key To Quitting Porn And Weed Is...

Summary

In this video by ManTalks, the speaker addresses the challenges of quitting porn and weed, emphasizing that the root of addiction is not just about sobriety, but about connection. He highlights the importance of understanding the internal states that drive us to seek such addictive behaviors. Instead of focusing solely on the substance, the speaker encourages viewers to identify the emotions and situations that lead to the desire to alter one's state, like stress or boredom. Once identified, alternate methods such as meditation or physical activity can be employed to achieve a healthier state change. The key takeaway is the significance of recognizing and altering the triggers that lead to addiction, encouraging a shift towards connection, both with oneself and possibly with others.

Highlights

• Quitting addictions is more about connection than just achieving sobriety. ✨
• Emotions like stress often trigger addictive behaviors. 😖
• Find healthy ways to manage your emotional state, like journaling. 📓
• Build connections with others or your ideal self to combat addiction. 🤗
• Recognize the emotional states you're avoiding with addictive substances. 🔍

Key Takeaways

• The root of addiction isn't just sobriety, but about seeking connection. 🤝
• Understand the emotional triggers that lead to addictive behaviors. 🧠
• Use healthier alternatives like meditation or exercise to change your state. 🧘‍♂️
• Connection with oneself or others is crucial to overcoming addictions. ❤️
• Identify and alter the states you're trying to avoid or change. 🔄

Overview

Ever found yourself scrolling through video content on quitting bad habits? You're not alone! In this insightful video by ManTalks, the discussion hits home for those trying to escape the grips of addictions like porn and weed. It’s less about cutting off cold and more about understanding what drives us to those behaviors in the first place.

The core message revolves around connection – both the need for it and lack thereof. Instead of focusing solely on quitting, the aim is to delve into the emotions that lead to these habits, such as stress, loneliness, or boredom. By acknowledging what you’re trying to avoid, you can tackle the root cause of the addiction.

Swapping harmful habits for healthier ones is key! Think meditation, exercise, and spending time with friends. These are great tools not just for coping, but for building a strong connection with your inner self and the world around you. It’s a journey of self-discovery and forging meaningful connections that ultimately lead to freedom from addiction.

The Key To Quitting Porn And Weed Is... Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 [Applause] so if you clicked on this video and you're watching this you are probably wanting to quit porn or at least reduce the amount that you're using and this is a big issue for a lot of men it's probably going to get worse with the rise of AI and chat Bots and AI generated porn it's probably only going to get worse but there's one thing that I have found that most people don't talk about or take into consideration
• 00:30 - 01:00 when it comes to quitting porn and you can use what I'm about to share with you in any type of addictive behavioral pattern that you're wanting to shift right maybe you want to stop smoking weed which most people say is not an addictive drug but you can sure as hell create a dependency on weed maybe you drink too much booze whatever it is there is a way for you to quickly and effectively shift that addictive behavior and I want to start by sharing
• 01:00 - 01:30 this quote by Johan Hari he said the opposite of addiction is not sobriety the opposite of addiction is not sobriety the opposite of addiction is connection and this is I want you to just keep this in the back of your head because the real hack if we can call it a hack I don't like the word hack I think that's used too often but the real work of Shifting your addictive behavior is in altering the pattern of alter altering your state okay this is the the
• 01:30 - 02:00 epicenter at the at the very core of changing your porn usage how much weed you smoke it is about altering the pattern of altering your state because for most men when they're going to smoke weed when they go and you know want to watch porn they are doing so because they're looking for something to alter their state I don't like what I'm feeling I want to feel something
• 02:00 - 02:30 different I'm overwhelmed I'm stressed out I feel like crap my girlfriend and I had a fight and I'm you know I'm horny and I can't be with all the anger and frustration of what's happening in the relationship and so I need to go jerk off and feel better team this episode is brought to you by Henson's shaving now these are legitimately no BS my favorite razors it's one of the reasons why I love working with this brand um if you're born after the 19 70s is very
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• 03:30 - 04:00 buying the like really expensive razor it would still irritate the crap out of me and I have the like thick coarse hair which would cause the razor to get clogged up all the time and so the beautiful thing that I found about Henson's design is that it is simple it is clean it is sturdy it is precise and it gives me the best shave that I have ever had in my life so if you are interested in having the best shave of your life in my
• 04:00 - 04:30 opinion then go to Hensen shaving docomo again it's Hensen hns n shaving docomo and use the promo code mans and you will get two years worth of of blades for free uh in your order so try it out today I've really loved it and enjoyed it and I would love to hear how you enjoy it as well Gabor mate had another great quote that fits in with with this he said the question is not
• 04:30 - 05:00 why the addiction the question is why the pain and so for many of you that are trying to stop watching porn smoke less weed drink less the question isn't why why do I do this Behavior right why uh why do I keep watching this porn blah blah blah blah that's not really as important as what am I trying to avoid what state am I experiencing before I go
• 05:00 - 05:30 to watch it that I am trying to alter write the question down start to journal on that question dive into it because the reality is that you use substances external substances like weed and booze and even pornography or sexting women or whatever it is you use those substances to alter an internal state right every guy nose you feel like crap you're
• 05:30 - 06:00 stressed out you're overwhelmed at the end of the day you open up your favorite porn sight you get off jerk off you feel better even if it's just for a little period of time before the overwhelm and the to-do list or the anxiety or the depression starts to creep back in you feel better you alter the state and what happens over time is that you create a pattern where anytime time that you feel
• 06:00 - 06:30 that state overwhelmed anxious angry frustrated disconnected lonely bored whatever that state is internally anytime you feel that state your brain which is a very incredible machine will say ah I know the solution to this state I know what to do when I feel this way go open up the porn tab all right go light up the joint go smoke the bowl whatever it is right and so what you
• 06:30 - 07:00 have to start to get very clear on if you are wanting to shift away from and we're talking mostly about porn in this video but again applies in any addictive behavior what you have to get very clear on is what state am I trying to alter what state am I already experiencing that I'm trying to get away from and once you realize that once you have that very ingrained oh I'm I'm trying to I'm usually trying to get away from this sense of loneliness or I'm usually trying to to numb out or
• 07:00 - 07:30 or state change this boredom that I feel or this overwhelm or this stress that I'm feeling once you start to get very clear on that then you can work on it but if you don't know the internal state that you are trying to shift then all of the rest of the steps that most people recommend are going to be largely useless because you won't understand the the trigger points that are happening internally the thing that's setting off the whole C Cascade of events that will
• 07:30 - 08:00 unfold afterwards so what state are you trying to alter and then to come back to the Johan Hari quote we have to move to a state of connection now that connection doesn't always have to be with other people yes it can be very helpful to you know reach out to a buddy uh yes it can be helpful to you know go for a walk with your girlfriend or your wife or have a conversation or whatever it is it can be very helpful to connect
• 08:00 - 08:30 with other people in your life because the reality is that connection and relationship are the the bomb or the Salve or the antidote for so many addictive behaviors it's in the Solitude of those moments where people really struggle now you could also be connecting to maybe not other people but a higher version of yourself the the version of yourself
• 08:30 - 09:00 that you are trying to step into and you can use connective things like behaviors that reinforce who it is that you are connecting to who it is that you are wanting to be so what do I mean by that instead of using porn to State change I feel bored I feel lonely I feel anxious I feel stressed you can use breath work to State change what you feel internally you can use meditation to State change
• 09:00 - 09:30 what you feel internally you can use journaling you can connect to going to the gym there's a number of different things that you can deploy in order to create that state change but at the base of it what's happening internally when you want to use porn and cannot quit is that you have created a pattern of altering your internal state by deploying this external mechanism and when you start to shift the mechanism of altering the state by learning how to
• 09:30 - 10:00 downregulate your nervous system AKA how to soothe yourself when you feel stressed or overwhelmed or anxious the The Urge or the desire to want to go and watch the porn is going to reduce substantially now the key is that this takes time and part of the part of the key that is so important is identifying what those states are that you are trying to alter now if you are like me I
• 10:00 - 10:30 had I had like a dozen states that I didn't like I didn't like feeling anxious I didn't like feeling bored I didn't like feeling lonely uh I didn't like feeling overwhelmed or stressed and so any of those States would trigger the deployment of this pattern this behavior of wanting to go watch porn or smoke weed or have a drink and so I had to work tirelessly of anytime I felt those States and then I felt the subsequent urge to go and you know use one of these numbing out mechanisms of porn or
• 10:30 - 11:00 whatever then I would have a list of things I could go do okay I'm going to go meditate right now for 10 minutes okay I still feel the urge to go and state change I'm going to do some intense breath work all right there we go great oh you know what I you know I that didn't work either I'm gonna go move my body I'm G to go for a run I'm GNA go work out I'm G to do some burpees all right there we go there it is I like got the state change that I needed or I'm going to call a buddy and go for a walk you know down by the beach or in
• 11:00 - 11:30 the forest I'm going to get some time in nature all of those things are going to do the same or similar thing that porn and weed and booze do which is that they are going to alter your internal State however they're going to alter your internal state in a different way they're going to alter your internal state in a way that is congruent with who you likely want to be and they are going to alter your internal state with connection to other people to your
• 11:30 - 12:00 values to your morals and your ethics whereas using and deploying some of those other tactics are disconnecting you from other people from your values from your morals from who you say you want to be so use this tool write down write down today don't wait till the next week ask yourself what state am I trying to avoid what state of am I trying to alter by
• 12:00 - 12:30 deploying things like pornography and then secondly what tools can I use instead what can I deploy instead to alter my state in a way that aligns with who I am who I want to be that aligns with my values comment below um hopefully this helps you Manet 4 share this with somebody that you know needs to hear it that you know will support them uh but man it forward and comment Below in the comment section if you're
• 12:30 - 13:00 watching me on YouTube otherwise don't forget to subscribe wherever you are whether you are on Spotify tuning into to this whether you are on YouTube tuning into this subscribe and I'll see you next week [Applause]