What I Wish I'd Known Before Psychosis

Summary

In this heartfelt video, Carolynn Ponzoha shares her personal journey through psychosis, shedding light on the unexpected and often misunderstood aspects of this mental health condition. From grappling with intense emotions and delusions to finding recovery and community, Ponzoha provides a vulnerable and candid account of what she wishes she had known before experiencing psychosis. Through her story, viewers gain insights into the complexities of psychosis, the importance of support systems, and the journey towards healing and acceptance. Ponzoha's narrative serves as both a guide and a comfort to those affected directly or indirectly by psychosis.

Highlights

• Carolynn highlights that psychosis is indescribably real and can't be fully prepared for. 🤯
• She reveals the confusion and intensity of delusions, shedding light on misconceptions. 🔦
• Carolynn discusses the importance of recognizing psychosis symptoms without needing all of them present. 👀
• She underscores the need for a safety net of trusted individuals during psychotic episodes. 🛡️
• Carolynn shares her belief in recovery and the importance of medication and support. 💊
• She opens up about the power of community and finding others with similar experiences. 🌍
• Carolynn dispels the shame around psychosis, defining it as a medical condition like any other. 🩺
• The journey through psychosis isn't linear, but filled with learning and eventual healing. 🧗‍♂️
• She expresses the joy and stability found in remission and recovery. 🕊️

Key Takeaways

• Psychosis is an intense, life-altering experience, often leaving individuals feeling completely transformed. 🌪️
• Delusions and hallucinations aren't just dramatic scenes from a movie; they can play out subtly or severely in real life. 🎭
• Not everyone with psychosis experiences all symptoms, as psychosis manifests differently in each person. 🤔
• Knowing the warning signs of psychosis can aid in seeking timely help and support. 🚨
• Having a support system is invaluable during episodes of psychosis. 🤝
• Recovery is possible, and life can be wonderful again with proper treatment and a support system. 🌈
• There is no shame in experiencing psychosis; it's an illness, not a character flaw. ❤️
• Community and shared experiences are powerful in providing solace and understanding. 👐
• Insight into one's psychosis doesn't diminish its severity, but can be a tool in managing it. 🔍

Overview

Carolynn Ponzoha opens up about her journey through psychosis in an authentic and raw narrative, describing how the experience profoundly altered her life. From delving into the intensity of delusions to navigating public misperceptions, she lays bare the challenges and unexpected realities of living with this mental health condition.

Throughout the video, Ponzoha emphasizes the key lessons she's learned, such as the importance of recognizing the symtoms and finding a trustworthy support network. Her personal anecdotes shed light on the internal battles faced during episodes and the misconceptions surrounding psychosis.

Ultimately, Ponzoha's story is one of hope and recovery. With a strong support system and dedication to her treatment, she showcases the possibility of reclaiming life post-psychosis. Her candid discussion aims to destigmatize the condition, showing that with understanding and care, life after psychosis can be fulfilling and joyful.

Chapters

• 00:00 - 01:00: Introduction The "Introduction" chapter reflects on profound life experiences, comparing the impact of psychosis to major life events like marriage, childbirth, and the death of a loved one. The narrator shares a personal transformation after experiencing five psychotic episodes, emphasizing that such experiences are fundamentally life-altering and noting that no amount of preparation can truly ready someone for psychosis.
• 01:00 - 03:30: What is Psychosis Like? This chapter delves into the profound and often indescribable nature of psychosis, emphasizing the overwhelming intensity of the experience. Words may communicate the facts of psychosis, but they cannot fully convey the emotional depth and sensory distortions involved. The experience is described as being 'more real than real,' underscoring its intensity. One of the most disconcerting aspects of psychosis is the loss of trust in one's own mind, with individuals feeling betrayed by their mental faculties. This experience is something that one cannot truly prepare for, as it defies adequate description and understanding.
• 03:30 - 06:30: Myths and Misconceptions about Psychosis The chapter titled 'Myths and Misconceptions about Psychosis' highlights the profound impact of psychotic experiences, comparing it to life-altering events like childbirth. It emphasizes the difficulty in fully preparing oneself for such experiences, as they profoundly change every aspect of one's life. The narrative suggests that while practical preparations can be made, the emotional and psychological adjustments are complex and challenging.
• 06:30 - 16:00: Experiencing Delusions and Hallucinations The chapter titled 'Experiencing Delusions and Hallucinations' delves into the personal reflections and insights of someone who has undergone psychosis. The speaker reveals a desire for having prior knowledge and preparation about the life-altering impact of psychosis. They express that understanding the nature of their episodes could have facilitated a more peaceful recovery and comprehension of their experiences. This introduction serves as a preamble to discuss the crucial knowledge they wish they had before experiencing psychosis, which will be explored further in the chapter.
• 16:00 - 21:00: Insight During Psychosis This chapter introduces the concept of gaining insight during episodes of psychosis. The narrator emphasizes that the content is based on personal experience rather than professional expertise, offering a disclaimer that they are not qualified to provide clinical advice. Instead, they aim to share their personal journey and what could have prepared them better for their experiences with psychosis.
• 21:00 - 27:00: Warning Signs and Need for Support The chapter titled 'Warning Signs and Need for Support' involves a discussion on mental illness, specifically in the context of psychosis. The speaker emphasizes their experiences with mental health recovery, sharing wisdom and insights gained along their journey. The chapter includes a trigger warning, acknowledging that the topics discussed may be sensitive or distressing to some listeners. It focuses on the emotional impacts of shame and traumatic events connected to psychosis, encouraging viewers to take care of their own emotional well-being during the discussion.
• 27:00 - 31:00: Recovery and Finding Community The chapter discusses the unexpected nature of experiencing psychosis, especially for someone who never imagined it would be relevant to their life. The speaker notes that psychosis does not run in their family and they are the first to experience it in generations, highlighting the isolation and surprise that can accompany such a diagnosis. The chapter may further explore the themes of recovery and finding a supportive community after experiencing psychosis, emphasizing the importance of understanding and companionship in the healing process.
• 31:00 - 36:00: The Importance of Not Being Ashamed The chapter explores the concept of understanding personal mental health struggles, particularly the feeling of not knowing or being ashamed of one's mental condition. The narrator discusses their personal experience with mental health, emphasizing the difficulties in recognizing and understanding their own symptoms. They reflect on how media portrayals often fail to accurately represent individual mental health experiences, leaving many people confused or ashamed.
• 36:00 - 43:30: Reflecting on Personal Experiences The chapter "Reflecting on Personal Experiences" discusses the casual misuse of the terms 'delusion' and 'delusional,' which are often inaccurately used in everyday language, particularly in political contexts. The speaker reflects on the fact that delusions are actually related to psychosis and criticizes how these terms are frequently used to dismiss opposing political beliefs as merely delusional rather than recognizing them as genuine, albeit differing, beliefs.
• 43:30 - 48:00: Conclusion and Call to Action In the concluding chapter, the narrator reflects on the misuse of terms like 'delusional' and 'delusion' in popular culture, indicating a disconnect between their true meanings and how they are perceived or used in society. The chapter seems to touch upon personal experiences or realizations of misunderstood terms and how they relate to societal perceptions, particularly emphasizing the narrator's own surprise and reevaluation upon encountering these terms.

What I Wish I'd Known Before Psychosis Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 Much like marriage and childbirth and experiencing the death of a loved one, psychosis can be a lifealtering experience, it can fundamentally change a person. And while not everyone may agree with that, I know for myself, I'm a completely different person after five psychotic episodes, that's just the fact of the matter. And the thing is, nothing can prepare you for psychosis. There's really no accurate way to depict the
• 00:30 - 01:00 intensity of psychosis because while words may convey the facts, the emotions are beyond explanation, the senses are beyond explanation, it's more real than real. So that alone is something you can't prepare for. You can't prepare for something that can't adequately be described. But on top of that, losing your mind, losing trust in your mind. Being betrayed by your mind is an
• 01:00 - 01:30 experience that is so total like it it wrecks you. It completely overhauls every aspect of your life. And that is another thing that can't be prepared for. I don't think people can prepare for things like child birth. I mean not in the sense of like emotionally preparing yourself for enduring the event of childbirth. You can prepare by you know nesting in your home and reading baby books. But nothing can
• 01:30 - 02:00 prepare you for something that is that lifealtering. And so if I had known, if I had known what I was getting into, I think I could have had a little more peace at least in recovering from it, in understanding what had happened to me, because for many of my episodes, I didn't understand what had happened to me. I really wish there were things I had just known. So today, we're going to go over some things that I wish I'd known before going into psychosis,
• 02:00 - 02:30 things that could have better prepared me for the ordeal I was about to go through. [Music] Before we get started, I would just like to throw out a disclaimer to say that I am not a mental health care professional and I am in no way qualified to give any advice medical, psychiatric or otherwise. who I am simply as a person with lived experience having serious
• 02:30 - 03:00 mental illness who is here to share with you the wisdom and insight I've gleaned along my journey of mental health recovery. Also, a trigger warning to say that the subject of psychosis in and of itself is a sensitive subject that may at times be difficult to talk about. So, if at any point during today's video I say anything that may trigger or upset you, you are more than welcome to leave. In this video specifically, we will be talking about shame and traumatic events related to psychosis. If that is not
• 03:00 - 03:30 your cup of tea, you are more than welcome to leave. Psychosis was not at all what I was expecting. Not that I could have expected it because psychosis was so far away from me before it ever happened. You know, it doesn't run in my family. I'm the first member of my family in God knows how many generations to ever experience psychosis. Um, I've never known anyone before me that had psychosis. It was such a far away
• 03:30 - 04:00 distant term that I really didn't know what it was. And all I had to go off of were media representations. And while a lot of them, yes, are inaccurate, even the accurate ones didn't adequately portray what I went through. So, while I was going through with it, it was a mystery. First of all, you don't always know what's happening to you. Maybe you don't understand that your reality isn't real. But even when I did, it just wasn't what I was expecting. I wish I'd known what a delusion was. I don't think
• 04:00 - 04:30 I even knew that delusions were related to psychosis. And a large part of this is because of the way delusion and delusional are casually thrown around so inaccurately. I commonly hear delusion used in a political sense to say that someone of an opposing party is delusional for their political beliefs. Not to say false beliefs, just beliefs
• 04:30 - 05:00 you don't agree with. And I would hear, you know, dulu, which is kind of a popular internet term now, that really just kind of means, I don't know, like overly attached girlfriend or something like that. Like the way delusional and delusion are used is so far from what it actually is that when I was going through it, I had no idea that it was the same word that was describing these
• 05:00 - 05:30 completely different uh situations. Delusions to me were not having beliefs about how I would run the government. I mean delusions to me were being abducted by the government very different fixed false beliefs are so deeply ingrained that I I I couldn't I don't know I couldn't cope with them like I was so paranoid of them
• 05:30 - 06:00 that I would go to great lengths to I don't know try to deal like for instance um this is where the shame trigger comes in so if you don't want to hear about public humiliation. I will put a time stamp for where you can jump to. Um, one thing that I was deeply ashamed of in psychosis was having gone streaking because I was so paranoid that I would be abducted by FBI agents that I stripped naked thinking I'd be invisible
• 06:00 - 06:30 and stre. And this was such an extreme reaction to a false belief. any beliefs I have in my ordinary day-to-day life aren't that extreme. They're not that realistic. They're not that ingrained in me that I would go to such great lengths. And this event was deeply traumatic. I was publicly exposed and I was
• 06:30 - 07:00 uh abused by police who picked me up and they sexually abused me and it was delusions are not what they seem. Hallucinations I feel are a bit easier to understand because your five senses are so definite. If I smell something I smell something. No refuting that. But in my first episode when I did have some clarity and insight, I was aware that I
• 07:00 - 07:30 was believing things that weren't true. And it's hard to juggle both believing and not believing in something. For instance, I Okay, another trigger warning. Skip to the time stamp if you want to avoid violence, gore. I had a delusion that I had carved my face with my ceramics tools. I had like cutting tools and I had just gouged out my entire face and I would touch my face and it would feel fine and I'd think, "Okay, that can't be true." But I still believed it so strongly. And I'd
• 07:30 - 08:00 look in the mirror and my face would be fine. And there'd be this second layer of saying, "Well, that's just your your mirror playing tricks on you." And the belief, while seeming so far-fetched, was just deeply deeply ingrained in me. And I'd think, I don't remember doing this. I don't have any recollection of cutting up my face. So, why do I still believe this? And I couldn't shake it. I didn't know that delusions, not only when you know they're not real, are so
• 08:00 - 08:30 fixed that you still can't let go of that obsession, that thought that's racking your brain. Aside from not knowing what delusions were and being very confused when they happened to me, I wish I'd known that you don't have to have every symptom. You don't have to have delusions and hallucinations. You can have hallucinations. You can have delusions, but you don't have to have both. I didn't realize that psychosis could happen independent of hallucinations. I thought that this was
• 08:30 - 09:00 a must. I thought that you had to have hallucinations in every episode. And I would have entire episodes without hallucinations at all. And this is because my psychosis tends to be very depressive. And depressive episodes lean more heavily towards delusional beliefs. And so when I'd come out of my episodes and be told that I'd had psychosis, I didn't believe this because I didn't have the evidence of hallucinations. And I felt like a fraud and I couldn't explain this event because yes, there
• 09:00 - 09:30 were these extra realistic things that had happened to me outside of reality. They just weren't this classical image that I had in my mind. Honestly, with the amount of symptoms that psychosis has, it would make sense that you wouldn't need to have all of them. And really, hallucinations are one of more than a dozen symptoms I can think of off the top of my head. And so, while, you know, it logically makes sense, you
• 09:30 - 10:00 know, you don't have to hallucinate, I had seen in movies hallucinations, right? I'd seen like a a beautiful mind which has a lot of hallucinations, a lot of people that are hallucinated and I didn't see that many people in one of my episodes I did but that was one episode and therefore I couldn't have possibly had psychosis and I suffered and I struggled that I didn't accept what had happened to me and without accepting what had happened to me it was just so
• 10:00 - 10:30 much harder to overcome. Another thing I'd wish I'd known is that you can have insight. And now I didn't have much education of psychosis before it happened to me. And I didn't know whether you'd know you had it or not. But still, nonetheless, when I had insight, I guess that didn't seem valid to me. I I guess there was a part of me that knew I probably should fully believe in what was happening. And so
• 10:30 - 11:00 because I had some awareness then it must not be true. And this assumption of mine made it really hard to get help. I couldn't very well self- advocate for myself without fully believing that this was true. I knew factually that I had psychosis. I had looked into it. I had webmded it. But I had it and and I couldn't really confidently stand firm to that ground. So, I didn't get the diagnosis I need needed and subsequently
• 11:00 - 11:30 went into further episodes. I doubted myself because I knew what was happening to me. I didn't know that that's pretty normal. I've had some episodes with insight. I've had some episodes without insight. And I have to say that your episodes can still be severe even with insight. And it's honestly a different challenge. It's still challenging. It doesn't make your life that much easier
• 11:30 - 12:00 to have insight honestly. Like I was able to go to work and go to school, but I was confused constantly by the state of my mind. I was very distracted. I was very stressed. I was very paranoid. Like the paranoia was just as real in either regard. And it it really isn't as big of a difference as one might think to have insight because your symptoms are still just as realistic as if you didn't. The
• 12:00 - 12:30 only difference is that at least now you know. Another thing is that I wish I'd known the warning signs. And yes, there are warning signs to psychosis. It doesn't just come on like that. I think in some instances it might because there's say for instance brief episode psychosis I believe it's called and that would be an episode lasting anywhere from one day to a month and in that case I could see it coming on very quickly but for me it was usually gradually
• 12:30 - 13:00 maybe over the span of a few weeks at its fastest and so I wish I'd known to look for things like negative symptoms as I discussed last week negative symptoms that look a lot like depression. Um, I wish I could have identified, okay, when I'm starting to feel low and I'm starting to withdraw and I'm starting to lose my drive, I might be slipping. That didn't indicate anything to me. I already suffered from mental illness before psychosis, so this
• 13:00 - 13:30 seemed normal. And if I'd known that there are warning signs or that I could let people know about the warning signs so they could see them in me, I could have gotten help sooner. I could have avoided a lot of suffering. It usually wasn't until the point that I had tipped past insight into anesignosia, which is a loss of awareness of your symptoms, that I would really need help. And I would know to a degree that I needed help, but I
• 13:30 - 14:00 didn't know why. I knew that something was wrong because my world was chaotic and I was being hunted and I was being possessed or whatever I may believe. And and I knew that I needed help. I just didn't know in what capacity or for why. And if I could have had the help sooner when I did have enough insight to recognize what was coming on, that would have spared me years of my life that were lost. And along those lines, I wish I'd known that
• 14:00 - 14:30 I needed help and support and save people in my life even before it came on because I had one really significant episode in which I lacked support. And the people in my life were not safe people. They were not people I could trust. They were fair weather friends. I was deep into my addiction and I was drinking at the bar every day and pretty much my life revolved around going to
• 14:30 - 15:00 the bar. I'm a bar girl, I suppose. And the people in my life were bargoers. They were my bar friends and those weren't close relationships. They were very superficial. They were not people who could take care of me. We were usually inebriated with each other. And my family were gone. I actually live like over a thousand miles from my family because they live in Chicago and I'm in Seattle, which is about a 1,700 mile difference. So, no one could protect me. No one who knew about my
• 15:00 - 15:30 condition was there to identify it. And left up to the devices of the people around me, my friends from the bar, I ended up in really bad hands. I was evicted from my apartment. I was homeless. And they really didn't care. They all kind of left and I was on my own. It was a very dangerous situation. I didn't know that I needed a support system. I didn't know that I needed people I could trust. I didn't really care who was in my life at that time because I was pretty reckless. So, I
• 15:30 - 16:00 didn't consider that it was important to have a network of safe people looking out for me. Something that I think everyone needs regardless of having psychosis or not. I wish I'd known that this wouldn't be forever and that it could get better because the recovery phase was really really hard for me and I didn't think I'd ever improve. It's a very long process and for me it took over a year from my last no my worst episode, my second or third to whatever
• 16:00 - 16:30 the order. Um my worst episode took about 18 months to recover from to the point where I could confidently say that I'd recovered. And I genuinely didn't think I'd ever regain the cognitive abilities I lost. I mean, those did take years to recover, mind you, even after recovering just initially from the symptoms. Um, I I genuinely didn't think that life would move on. I thought I would be stuck in this miserable
• 16:30 - 17:00 situation. I thought the rest of my life I would be this really like dumbed down version of myself that was so rattled I couldn't think, couldn't speak. I thought that was my life forever. I didn't know I'd be okay someday. I didn't know I'd be myself someday. In fact, my life is so amazing today, it's better than I could have envisioned before psychosis. It's better than I could have asked for before the worst events of my life ever happened. I think
• 17:00 - 17:30 after psychosis, I would have settled for a lot less than what I have today because anything could have been an improvement. But my life is so genuinely wonderful today that even at my healthiest, I couldn't have imagined it being this good. You know, I'm very stable. I'm med compliant. So, I've been in remission for 5 years, and fortunately for me, remission looks like being asymptomatic because my medication is so effective that I no longer have any symptoms. And beyond that, I have a healthy relationship. I'm about to be
• 17:30 - 18:00 married. Um, I'm part of a beautiful community of people who are on the same path as me, recovering from addiction and mental health. I am a flourishing artist. Like, I've got my creative ability back. I've got my drive back. you know, I'm I'm recovered in more ways than just having recovered from psychosis. Like, I am well. I am mentally well in pretty much every regard. And that was an impossibility 5 years ago. And circling back to that community, many people in my community,
• 18:00 - 18:30 both physically, in person, and online, have the same issues as me and have had the same experiences as me. like really specific things that I never would have thought could happen to anyone but me. Like so scarily specific. Let me tell you. And I wish I'd known that I wouldn't be alone because for like 10 years after my first episode, I felt so alone. I wouldn't open up about it. I wouldn't talk about it. I denied it. And
• 18:30 - 19:00 I carried so much of this burden by myself, which was very, very, very heavy and hard to carry. And I wish I'd known that there was a whole world of people out there who knew what I'd been through, who could relate. And fortunately, I've found that. And I hope that people through my videos can also find that. Like, I know how hard it is to be alone in this. And I know it was revolutionary to me to find people who could relate. And a large part of why I
• 19:00 - 19:30 continue making videos even when I don't feel like it is because I know there are people out there who need to be represented and are very alone, very alone, who've probably never heard their story told back to them like I needed to hear. And maybe I can tell you your story back to you and we can relate and then we both won't be so alone. And finally, I wish I'd known that it was nothing to be ashamed of, that it was an illness. It wasn't character flaws. It
• 19:30 - 20:00 wasn't, I don't know, being immoral or something. It wasn't anything wrong with me. It's an illness. Illnesses are neutral. They're not out to personally get you. They're not on some vendetta to ruin your life. They are functioning as they're designed. And it is nothing personal. When you think of it clinically, psychosis could be like any other illness. It could be like epilepsy. It could be like MS. It could be like IBS. Those aren't character
• 20:00 - 20:30 flaws. They're illnesses. And there's really nothing to be ashamed of when you break it down like that. Also, going back to that community of people who can relate, those shared experiences are all symptoms. Like the actions we perform are related to symptoms. And having the knowledge today that there are people who've been through those same symptoms helps me to realize there's nothing to be ashamed about in this commonality in this experience made up of symptoms that
• 20:30 - 21:00 may look like bizarre behavior and logic that are really just manifestations of an illness in your mind. So knowing that today, knowing that the symptoms are not character flaws, the illness is not a character flaw. Nothing to be ashamed of. It helps immensely, but I didn't have that back then, and I really needed it then. I'm glad I have it today, but I wish I'd known that back then. The things I was ashamed of that I've gotten past felt like things that were
• 21:00 - 21:30 insurmountable, right, until I met people who'd had the same experiences. One experience I had in psychosis was an illegitimate marriage. And if you don't know what that looks like, it looks like a marriage that really can't be bound by law. like it's not a consensual marriage. I couldn't consent to marriage in psychosis and I had it enulled which means that it was absolved in court. I was deemed mentally incapacitated meaning that I could not make my own decisions legal or otherwise with
• 21:30 - 22:00 reasonable discretion i.e. I could not consent to anything and that was a very very shameful thing to come back from. I haven't met anyone like me who's had a legal analment. I've met people who've had Catholic anolments. They're slightly different. There's different grounds. Um, but the court process was humiliating and, you know, getting a subsequent no contact order was difficult. And the whole road back from that, I didn't want to talk about it.
• 22:00 - 22:30 And when I did talk about it, it was awkward. I didn't know what to refer to my ex-husband as. I've settled on ex-husband because the marriage did happen, just not legally. Um, I've met scores of people who have done the exact same thing. I have met countless people who've been married in psychosis and had illegitimate marriages that they had to escape. And w how validating to find out that something as specific as the worst experience of my life isn't unique to me. It's actually
• 22:30 - 23:00 something that other people have struggled with, too. And I don't struggle as much today having met people like me because they've gotten through it and they've helped me to get through it too. So psychosis, as I said, is a lifealtering event. And it would have helped to have been prepared. I wasn't prepared for it. But maybe this video can help you in some way, whether you've been through it yourself or have a loved one going through it or just happen to like watching purple and blue-haired chicks gab online. Um, however it
• 23:00 - 23:30 pertains to you, I would hope that this video would somehow serve as a way of alleviating whatever stress or burden may be weighing on you related to psychosis. If you're dreading going through it again and need clarity or insight, I would hope this video could offer that. If you are struggling with someone you love in psychosis presently and don't know how to handle it, I hope this might give you insight into their minds. Um, I really just I don't know. I
• 23:30 - 24:00 like to help people and I I don't know. I used to think that was a really selfish thing of people who are so altruistic because they they show up for the accolades. Like I know a lot of people in my community who love to be helpful because they get attention and and applause for it and likes and views and followers are obviously what come with the territory with this line of help. But, you know, this is something I think about a lot. A lot of what people tell me carries on with me and I I knew
• 24:00 - 24:30 really I'm like blown away by some of the things people have told me that honestly yeah they bother me what other people have been through that honestly I just feel that that I'm not ashamed to talk about my experiences anymore. I've come a long way since first experiencing psychosis and recovering from the last one to the point where I think I do have an ability to talk about it articulately in a way that might I don't
• 24:30 - 25:00 know offer some relief. Um and and I know not everybody's far enough on their journey that they can do that. And so for those of you out there who would like to be in this position that you can talk about it but you can't yet, maybe we can talk. I don't know. Um, I kind of am rambling at this point, but I think this is a more heartfelt video just because I was recently uh told in a comment by someone uh some of the things
• 25:00 - 25:30 they related with me on and it it just just kind of rattled my mind to I guess be reminded of yeah, this is a lifealtering experience. I think I get kind of complacent sometimes in my mind where I I get told a lot of the same comments over and over again and it almost desensitizes me to other people's experiences which is an unfortunate consequence of just being really public
• 25:30 - 26:00 all the time. Um, and I don't ever want to lose that sensitivity to what people have to say because every once in a while someone will say something that will just like shift my mind and I'll be reminded this is crazy. Like this is so insane what people go through that they're not talking about with anyone or they've been carrying by themselves. And that burden I just every once in a while my heart flares and I want to do
• 26:00 - 26:30 something about it. And there's I don't know. I don't know what else to do about it because I love to talk and I I think I'm a bit of a bit of a a chatter box. So maybe this helps. I don't know. Maybe I'm talking out my ass. But that's just kind of what I have to say about that. That's kind of where this topic came from today was just, you know, wanting to help. I think some of my videos are fun, some of my videos are educational, and some of them are helpful. Maybe all
• 26:30 - 27:00 of them are helpful. I don't know. This one hopefully will get through to people who could use a little help. Anyway, that's all I have for you today. That's the end of the video. Thank you so much for watching. I truly appreciate it. Really, um, if you'd like to support my channel, you can like, comment, subscribe, or hit the bell to get notifications to my future videos. Let me know in the comments what you wish you'd known before psychosis, or what you wish you could know to help a loved one through psychosis. um whether it be educational, emotional,
• 27:00 - 27:30 what have you, I'd love to hear from you. You can also support my channel by checking out my merch shop. I'm not sure if the link works. I try my best, but I'm pretty bad with links. Apparently, there are ads below this video, so check out the sweet stuff I have below. Um, and I put out videos every Thursday/ Friday, as well as Tik Tok compilations on Mondays. So, if you'd like to see more of my content, there's plenty coming soon. and I'll see you all in the next one. Thanks. Bye.
• 27:30 - 28:00 [Music]