Be gentle to be influential | Ust. Lobna Mulla | Juz 4 Qur’an 30 for 30 S6 | A Ramadan Series

Summary

In this insightful session from the "Qur’an 30 for 30" series by Yaqeen Institute, Ust. Lobna Mulla, alongside fellow speakers, explores the themes of resilience, forgiveness, and humility as portrayed in Juz 4. The discussion emphasizes the significance of relying on Allah in times of hardship and acknowledging that direct numbers or resources do not determine the outcome, rather one's faith does. Additionally, the conversation highlights the critical role of gentleness in influencing others, drawing inspiration from the Prophet Muhammad's leadership style, which emphasized leniency and compassion. The speakers also explore the idea of repentance and turning back to Allah, emphasizing that His mercy is always available for those who seek it sincerely.

Highlights

• Victory isn't determined by numbers; having faith in Allah can change the circumstances. 🙌
• The Battle of Badr exemplifies trusting in Allah's support despite being outnumbered and unequipped. 🛡️
• Toba, or repentance, is a constant opportunity to return to Allah, emphasizing His mercy. 🙏
• Prophet Muhammad's leniency towards companions showcases gentle leadership's power. 🌟
• Harshness in relationships can be detrimental; kindness and forgiveness strengthen bonds. 💕

Key Takeaways

• Trust in Allah over resources: Victory doesn't rely on material means but on faith. 🌟
• The power of Toba: Returning to Allah is always an option, regardless of past mistakes. 🌱
• Be gentle for influence: Kindness is key in nurturing relationships and leadership. ❤️
• Introspection is essential: Spend time reflecting alone to improve personal and relational dynamics. 🌿
• Forgiveness fosters connection: Being forgiving opens the door for better understanding and influence. 🤝

Overview

In this enriching session of the "Qur’an 30 for 30" series by Yaqeen Institute, Ust. Lobna Mulla, alongside his speakers, dives into an exploration of faith, humility, and the essence of relationships as guided by Islamic principles. The session opens with reflections on how the odds in life can be overwhelmingly against us, yet with Allah on our side, victory becomes attainable. This concept is beautifully illustrated through the story of the Battle of Badr, teaching us that reliance on faith rather than sheer numbers is what truly matters.

Forgiveness takes center stage in this episode as the speakers delve into the concept of Toba – the act of repentance and returning to Allah. It’s emphasized that no matter how severe past mistakes might be, Allah's mercy is limitless, welcoming back anyone who seeks redemption. This approach nurtures a sense of hope and encouragement for believers to continuously strive for personal betterment and spiritual growth.

Concluding the session, the focus shifts to gentleness in influence and leadership. Drawing from the character of Prophet Muhammad, the discussion highlights how a gentle and forgiving nature not only strengthens relationships but also enhances one's ability to lead effectively. The session encourages introspection, urging listeners to evaluate their own interactions and to extend kindness, much like the Prophet did, thereby fostering stronger, more meaningful connections in their personal and communal lives.

Chapters

• 00:00 - 02:30: Introduction and Importance of Gentleness This chapter discusses the theme of gentleness and its importance, especially in relationships. It emphasizes that when one has Allah, the odds do not matter regardless of feeling outnumbered or lacking resources. The narrator reassures the listener that repentance is always possible and never too late, underscoring the need for gentleness as a means to have influence and positive interactions with others.
• 02:30 - 03:30: Day Four Reminder and Donations In this chapter, the speaker emphasizes the importance of being gentle and the desire for others to love and be around us. The chapter is part of the 'Quran 30 for 30' series and notes that it is currently day four of Ramadan. Additionally, there is a reminder to automate donations, as each day of Ramadan presents a new opportunity and blessing. The speaker expresses hope that the audience is enjoying Ramadan.
• 03:30 - 08:30: Discussion on the Odds and Trust in Allah The chapter discusses the importance of investing in Islamic resources and sharing content such as the Quran 30 for 30 series and Ramadan series on social media. It emphasizes not only donating but also sharing micro content to spread good deeds. The message encourages early involvement in these initiatives as part of contributing positively and trusting in Allah. The goal is to maximize reach and impact, invoking Allah's blessings and acceptance for these efforts.
• 08:30 - 15:00: The Concept of Toba and Repentance The chapter starts with a light-hearted conversation between the host and a repeat guest, discussing how people from California are moving to Dallas and impacting the cost of living. The host appreciates the blessings and institutions in Southern California.
• 15:00 - 25:00: The Importance of Gentleness in Relationships The chapter titled 'The Importance of Gentleness in Relationships' emphasizes the idea that odds and challenges in life are insignificant when one has faith in Allah. The transcript includes a mentioning of gratitude towards scholars and encourages the audience to continue learning from various sources. It underscores the significance of trust in Allah amidst life's adversities. The lesson shared in this chapter highlights that when supported by divine faith, individuals can overcome any obstacles in their relationships and life in general.
• 25:00 - 28:30: The Wisdom of Allah and Introspection The chapter "The Wisdom of Allah and Introspection" discusses the concept of perception versus reality in terms of resources and support, particularly during times when individuals feel outnumbered or under-resourced. It references Verse 123 from a religious text where Allah recalls the victory granted to believers at the Battle of Badr, emphasizing that Allah's support was pivotal despite the seemingly unfavorable circumstances. This serves as a reminder of divine wisdom and the importance of introspection during challenging times.
• 28:30 - 35:00: The Power of Forgiveness and Role Models The chapter titled 'The Power of Forgiveness and Role Models' discusses the concept of forgiveness and the influence of role models in one’s life. A key point noted in the transcript is the significance of the Battle of Badr, which took place on the 17th of Ramadan, a month associated with victory. The chapter emphasizes the importance of gratitude and being aware of God’s presence. This profound lesson highlights how obstacles or challenging situations can greatly influence personal growth and emphasizes the lessons derived from historical events, such as the Battle of Badr.
• 35:00 - 42:00: Self-reflection and Community Building In this chapter titled 'Self-reflection and Community Building', the speaker shares insights about maintaining motivation and team spirit, particularly in sports contexts. The reflection includes an anecdote from a Muslim athlete who was advised by their coach to ignore betting odds before a match. The rationale is that such odds often predict a loss, which can be demoralizing and detrimental to performance. Instead, the focus should be on personal and team strengths, fostering a more positive mindset and stronger community bonds.
• 42:00 - 45:00: Final Thoughts and Conclusions This chapter emphasizes the importance of mindset over statistics or predictions. It suggests that focusing too much on numbers, like sports scores or betting lines, can be demoralizing. The chapter draws a parallel to personal lives, suggesting that being overly fixated on external resources or numerical advantages can be misleading. It highlights the importance of maintaining faith and a positive attitude, implying that belief in oneself and divine support can outweigh numerical disadvantages.
• 45:00 - 53:00: Ending and Gratitude In this chapter titled 'Ending and Gratitude', the discussion begins by emphasizing that victory and success do not solely rely on material resources or numbers. The narrative suggests that sometimes challenges are presented to demonstrate that true victory comes from the divine aid of Allah, which is beyond worldly means. It uses the example of the first battle of Muslims, the Battle of Badr, to illustrate how this mindset was ingrained into the Muslim community from the onset. The chapter highlights a profound verse where Allah reminds of the divine assistance given during this pivotal battle, which shaped the ethos and psychological foundation of the Muslims.

Be gentle to be influential | Ust. Lobna Mulla | Juz 4 Qur’an 30 for 30 S6 | A Ramadan Series Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 [Music] the odds don't matter when you have Allah the odds don't matter when you have Allah tala and this is especially relevant in the current climate right I mean it feels like we're outnumbered or out resourced repentance is Never Too Late Allah is reassuring here that look I know you're going to make mistakes there's always an opportunity to turn back to him if you want to have influence in your relationships be gentle to have influence with people for
• 00:30 - 01:00 people to love you and they want to be around you you got to be gentle everyone welcome back to Quran 30 for30 ald we're on day four we want to remind you all to please go ahead and automate your donations insh every day of Ramadan is an opportunity every day of Ramadan is a day of blessing and we pray that you are enjoying the Ramadan
• 01:00 - 01:30 series as well as 30 for30 and everything else that's coming out of and know that you invest in these resources so while still early get in there and make sure that you automate and share the link by the way don't just share the link to donate share Quran 30 for30 share the Ramadan series if you're on a social media platform make sure that you're sharing the micro content uh this is a part of your a part of your good may Allah bless you all and accept from you all today we are blessed to have none other than
• 01:30 - 02:00 director of alhamdulillah a repeat guest now multiple times how are you alul doing well happy to be here how's California oh beautiful alhamdulillah alhamdulillah if you could please tell people from California stop moving to Dallas we we would appreciate it we stop driving they've driven up the cost of of living here quite a bit alhamdulillah alhamdulillah Allah bless you all and and bless our brothers and sisters there the amazing work by the way I tell people this that SoCal is actually loaded with amazing Islam institutions
• 02:00 - 02:30 amazing Scholars and there's so much out there may Allah bless them all and we we want people to benefit from everything that's out there so stop coming to Dallas go to so if you can afford it alhamdulillah in today as we get into J 4 so the lesson that I'm going to be putting forth today is the odds don't matter when you have Allah the odds don't matter when you have allaha and this is especially relevant in the current
• 02:30 - 03:00 right I mean it feels like we're outnumbered or out resourced and the verse is verse 123 in Al Allah says that remember when Allah subhanahu wa taala Made You Victorious at bad so Allah specifies bad which is by the way very unique because usually Allah does not mention the names of the battles when Allah subh Made You Victorious at bad when you were a
• 03:00 - 03:30 which uh typically would be translated as humiliated right or disgraced and so be mindful of Allah have TA of allaha so that you may be grateful first of all of course it's important to mention that the Battle of bad took place on the 17th of Ramadan Ramadan is a month of Victory so we ask Allah to Grant Victory to this umah in this blessed month Allah but this Ayah is deeply profound and it speaks directly to the lesson here the odds are a significant way that a person
• 03:30 - 04:00 or a people can feel demoralized when they look at the odds you think about subh and I actually remember this um this Reflection from a from an athlete Muslim athlete who was sharing with me that you know before a a match before they would play a game they'd be told by their coach never look at the odds because they've got the betting odds and the betting lines and sometimes it's so demoralizing when you look there and it says you know negative so and so and positive like you're you're you're you know you're you're expected to lose by
• 04:00 - 04:30 two touchdowns and stuff like that because then it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy like don't even look at the numbers don't look at the betting line like you got to go in there and feel like you're going to win every single game so sometimes just looking at the numbers is demoralizing likewise when you think about Subhan Allah in our in our individual lives um you know when we look at the resources on the other side we can be deceived by that or we look at the numbers on the other side we can be deceived by that and one of the things that we have to remind ourselves with constantly is that Allah subhana T
• 04:30 - 05:00 was never going to give us Victory through our resources or through our numbers in the first place and sometimes we're put in a situation like that so that Allah can demonstrate to us that Victory does not come through your means and you're putting too much trust in your means and in the case of the battle of bad this is the first battle so it sets the tone it it puts into motion the ethos the psyche of the Muslim Community but this Ayah is so profound because Allah says remember when Allah Made You Victorious at
• 05:00 - 05:30 while you were disgraced what Allah as the say what it means here is you were little in number so you weren't disgraced you were outnumbered but Allah subhana wa tala is using that word and of the benefits of him using that word is it describes the internal condition of defeat that could be there without allaha that if you didn't have Allah when you went out there had you not seen the Miracles of Allah subh already showing themselves with the Pres of the
• 05:30 - 06:00 angels with everything that was in the buildup to bed you would have been humiliated you would have felt defeat before you even started the battle I mean you're 3113 against a th you weren't even equipped militarily so by the way with bed it's not just that they didn't have the numbers on their side they were out on AIA they were out on an expedition it wasn't a full-out battle they didn't have their armor they didn't have their horses they didn't have their camels whereas the other side had full state-of-the-art military grade equipment right they had all their horses they had all their camels they
• 06:00 - 06:30 had the right Shields they had the right swords the Muslims had their normal clothes they had one or two horses and they didn't have that type of artillery so you're outnumbered you're out resourced had you not had Allah subhana wa tala you would have conceited internally that you're defeated before the battle even started but Allah subh says so be mindful of Allah usually when the word tawa is used it means fear Allah subhana wa tala right it it it carries within it a warning right don't
• 06:30 - 07:00 make the mistake in the future when you have the numbers on your side to lose tawa right so and fearing Allah subhana and trusting in Allah are two constants that are needed for any type of victory in an individual capacity or as a community so that you may be grateful and by the way the say of the power of this verse is that Allah subhana wa T is connecting the beginning meaning before
• 07:00 - 07:30 the battle happened to the aftermath of the battle that after you won don't forget to attribute that gratitude to Allah that you won because of Allah subhana wa tala right and many times when Allah subhana delivers us in a moment we attribute success to ourselves even if we have symbolic expression of gratitude to Allah but Allah is addressing the internal condition throughout so before even starts remember that you were right and
• 07:30 - 08:00 then Allah says an internal condition so that you may be grateful in internal condition right so all of this speaks to the internal condition because Allah does not change the outward until we change the Inward and that's when Victory actually comes to us you know and it just hones in on the fact that Islam is there's an internal aspect right we don't rely on the tangible things it's always that which is internal and starting with the heart and that's the
• 08:00 - 08:30 seed and as the prophet mentioned that there is not a piece of Flesh in the body and it's the heart the rhetorical question for us to know that look even though those circumstances are there this is when you really have to activate and there needs to be an intensity in regards to your trust in Allah in regards to your patience with the predestination of Allah and how he's prepared you to be better so that's so beautiful I mean that's so so many lessons in that regard yeah it really makes me think it really sets us up to have an optimistic mindset a positive outlook on Allah T because
• 08:30 - 09:00 oftentimes yes you review your own credentials your own capabilities your own situation and you know let alone the state of the umah right like on a large scale but on on a personal scale you think you know it's not going to happen it's not going to work I'm going to be stuck like this forever we really get stuck in our head and we get stuck in this fixed mindset but when we always think Allah is greater he can give you whatever you want you just have to ask him and be patient and regardless this test will be rewardable inshallah it gives you that hope not to overly rely on on yourself put your trust in lont P
• 09:00 - 09:30 it's it's it's freeing really within that process and I think it's important for us to know you know when dealing with our children with community members you know with with people that are trying their best to be their best but you know they sometimes they worry about what people may think about them we all make mistakes we're human beings sometimes we do rely on the tangible and then we need a you know a friend or someone to tell us that look you know your keep your eyes on the prize even though you made that mistake we're not going to totally judge you and know that
• 09:30 - 10:00 Allah subhana wa tala is a Allah is a he's the off forgiving or he's the one that returns you return to him he'll come to you because Toba means literally to return and that's really what I want to talk about is a title that repentance is Never Too Late Allah subhana wa tala says in the Quran in the chapter of verse 17 and 18 when speaking about Toba and it's really a verse of encouragement because Allah says after
• 10:00 - 10:30 Allah subhana T this verse is so beautiful because you know many of us out there we we we faced we faced you know things that have that have really altered our our continuance in our faith and being someone that's resilient and we get down at times and this is natural as human beings but Allah Allah is reassuring here that look I
• 10:30 - 11:00 know you're going to make mistakes and that's what this verse is really acknowledging that's why I love it so much where Allah says and remember Allah's acceptance of repentance is only for the ones who commit evil out of ignorance so here to upon Allah and some Scholars mention that this that Allah has made it obligatory upon himself and he's the only one that can do that to show the level of the desire that has for us to
• 11:00 - 11:30 be better by acknowledging the fact that we will make mistakes and he says Jala now Jala is not ignorance which is the lack of knowledge rather it is as someone would say acting in a manner that is not considering the consequences of your actions and you're not thinking about what's going to happen if I do this some could translate as foolishly but it's acting out of that type of nuance and whether it's following a desire and you're not thinking about the results of that so when Allah
• 11:30 - 12:00 says this Toba is for that person and that's what's so beautiful upon Allah is for the one that does this thing for that reason or that was the motivation following a desire that made them not think about the consequences of what they were going to do then Allah says and then uh and then they soon repent some Scholars mention CU means close that they seek repentance soon some Scholars mention that it is before
• 12:00 - 12:30 death or is before the day of judgment so that presents to us that Allah subhah wa taala even though within his predestination we may have done that action there is always an opportunity to be better there's always an opportunity to turn back to him and that's Toba to turn back you think you Ponder someone says something to you you listen to a lecture you ponder over okay what is the mistake that I made and you turn back to him then Allah says
• 12:30 - 13:00 it is towards it is towards such persons that Allah turns graciously Allah is the all knowing all wise so Allah is acknowledging here and it's interesting how Allah uses the same verb the on that tobas upon Allah for the ones that turn to Allah Allah subhana wa tala he'll return to them in forgiveness why because he
• 13:00 - 13:30 is when we look at the names at the end of the verses look at the context Allah is talking about Redemption here for the ones that really wake up there's a time in their life and like what better time than Ramadan when you're seeing the jam or you're trying to make a change internally by yourself alone with Allah subhana wa taala in the last third of the night in the middle of the day whenever at a time of deprivation to Allah subhana wa T you're turning to him you're trying your best that's all Allah wants from you is for you to be intentional when trying and that's where
• 13:30 - 14:00 Allah subhana wa tala will turn towards you so it's kind of as a scholar say that the reward is contingent upon the action even internally how are you feeling what is your intention is there a form of redemption is there a form of feeling a sense of n regret that your heart is broken that you feel this in like your heart is broken and deprived without having that sense of security or knowing that Allah subhana wa tala is
• 14:00 - 14:30 there and he is all knowledgeable that's why Allah ends it with that he is the all knowing and the all wise he knows if you're sincere in that Toba and he is wise enough to have this incident happen for you to make the correct choice to turn back to him that's why this verse is so beautiful as a reminder for us that Toba is always here for us to turn back to Allah it is always here for us as the prophet sallam even mentioned that the Toba will be here until the sun
• 14:30 - 15:00 rises from the West so know that Toba is always there for you to seek forgiveness from Allah subhana and this you know really ending with the message whenever I read this verse as well as someone that looks at you know the friends that kind of all of us each and every single one of us may have a family member a friend that you know they faced a bad situation in their life they were oppressed maybe when they were young something happened to them and it carries is over into the way that they
• 15:00 - 15:30 think about Allah and sometimes we tend to indirectly chastise them judge them blame them but only Allah and that person knows what's happened to them to where they've had that those types of thoughts which comes into those types of actions which translates or results in those types of actions especially the Dua the PE and the parents it's important to remember that everyone has their particular circumstances give people a chance be easy with them and always know have the attitude of being
• 15:30 - 16:00 someone that look Allah is rman I'm here for you there's always an opportunity to turn to them and not to be the one that speaks harshly to them and is rough to dough with them and I think that's Mah what sister lumna is going to talk about may Allah make us a those that turn back to him sincerely I want to comment on something that subh just occurred to my mind uh the Hadith of of Mam and Adam um very interesting because if you're reading the verse you
• 16:00 - 16:30 think that's what you're expecting most forgiving most merciful in which Allah is amplifying his forgiveness here but here Allah is amplifying his wisdom right his wisdom in letting you sin and then come back to him and what that can result in in terms of an outcome for you as an individual in the community so with Adam and mam when M meets Adam the prophet wasallam says that Musa says to Adam you're the one that got us kicked out of jna right you're you're that guy right if it's all because of you that we
• 16:30 - 17:00 went through this headache and Adam explains that look Allah subh decreed that before not that I am escaping accountability no Adam turned back to Allah and Allah forgave him but at the same time what what came as a result of this was going to happen out of the wisdom of Allah and what did Allah say to the angels when they question that are you going to play within the Earth someone who will spill
• 17:00 - 17:30 blood and spread corruption Allah I know what you don't know Allah is all knowing Allah is all wise which comes in a couple aat later so the idea here is that whether we're talking about the community making a mistake and Allah admonishing the community of Muhammad sallahu alai wasallam the best generation That Ever Walked the face of the Earth right admonishing them in that regard or as individuals the point is is that Allah is saying that that stumble first of all you need to own that you
• 17:30 - 18:00 stumbled but then when you turn back to Allah know that Allah can place you not just on a path to Redemption but on a path that is so much better for you that even the sin is now in your favor exactly even the sin is now in your favor and that's from the wisdom of Allah so it's from his forgiveness that he allows you to be redeemed and it's from his wisdom that he allows the set of events that comes after to actually
• 18:00 - 18:30 be in your favor Subhan Allah subh that's such a beautiful way to look at it because I think a lot of Youth in particular and and even and and people as as they you know as they as they grow and age um they they have a really difficult time reconciling their past and that can really eat away at them and and really affect their self-confidence and you know just living in that regret and that Doom can be so harmful um but remembering that Allah is so forgiving again gives gives so much hope I mean imagine being one of the people who fled from the prophet in how do you ever
• 18:30 - 19:00 forgive yourself seeing the prophet cry over seeing these crying over their relatives how do you forgive yourself if you're one of those 40 that left the the mountain after the prophet s told you not to leave it says he forgave them there's a wisdom in it's obviously you have to live with that for the rest of your life but Subhan Allah you know there's there's something that comes out of it as a result of it and that ending is that ending is good at the end of the day yes yeah Subhan Allah and I think that's a
• 19:00 - 19:30 beautiful segue into what the lesson that I wanted to talk about today which is if you want to have influence in your relationships be gentle Subhan Allah I I it's really amazing this is really based off of the Ayah in Surah Al Imran where Allah is addressing Prophet Muhammad wasallam and and really saying that this is a mercy from Allah that Allah that Prophet mam was gentle says
• 19:30 - 20:00 Subhan Allah it's out of Allah's Mercy that you oh Prophet have been lenient with them had you been cruel or hard hard-hearted they would have certainly abandoned you you just she just mentioned how how what a terrible thing that you know again out of foolishness out of not thinking in the moment seeing the the the treasure uh that the that the companions they disobeyed Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam they made that mistake and there was some really severe consequences and yet uh it
• 20:00 - 20:30 was out of the mercy of Allah that Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alaihi wasallam was merciful with the companions despite their grave error and I think what's really amazing is that look Prophet mhi wasallam a you know as he was giving the message yes he was not always uh a great world power in the moment right he he was he was making strides but always amongst the people he was very influential until Subhan Allah he was the most powerful man Subhan Allah of his time it's absolutely amazing I think
• 20:30 - 21:00 a lot of times we we think to be firm in our relationships whether we're a manager at work or we're you know with our kids or with our spouse or with our siblings or you know with friends that we have to draw the red line we have to have these really harsh boundaries we have to be tough and that's how we're going to have influence but actually here Allah is reminding us to have influence with people for people to love you and they want to be around you you got to be gentle that that that word lean Subhan Allah means soft s and
• 21:00 - 21:30 flexible uh and so that when a difficult time happens you're not overly harsh with people you're not reprimanding and and really making people feel small um you know really truly people remember whether again it's it's you know parent and child husband and wife um you know friends with within an organization people remember how you made them feel in a good way and in a bad way and um you know prob there's so many studies and research that are done for example within marital relationships that being
• 21:30 - 22:00 harsh being rude um you know being demeaning those patterns of behavior if they continue and in a significant manner they will destroy your marriage they will destroy your relationship Subhan Allah and when we think about other you know relationships that we care about at work and again at home if you do something that's negative to somebody if you say something negative or you're overly harsh with somebody you need to make that up and the study show this five times positive as many positive things
• 22:00 - 22:30 you have to make up for that one negative interaction that you had you have to interact with them in a way that is positive five times more than that one negative it just goes to show you being gentle especially you know people are going to mess up people make mistakes if Prophet wasallam could be gentle with his companions it's such a grave error why can't we do that in our relationships span I think it's really powerful I mean I I don't know why my mind went to I think cuz you brought up a how houses and such but in California
• 22:30 - 23:00 you know we have earthquakes that you can't uh build uh homes out of solely out of brick of course for as a facade that's different why it's too rigid when an earthquake happens it's too rigid what's going to happen the house is going to break it's going to fall so you know in our personality and when we're dealing with difficulty the more flexible you are like in Wood a home it has that flexibility has that ability to sway so that the house won't break and that's how we want to be in our relationships you know sometimes you want to say we have to show somebody that they were wrong I want to make sure
• 23:00 - 23:30 they apologize to me I want to I want to teach them a lesson but here Prophet Allah is reminding Prophet wasallam forgive them you know we we we just talked you guys just talked about how Allah is forgiving so why can't we embody that especially in Ramadan you know this is a time again through Salah through fasting we're really engaging in a lot of state of uh introspection within ourselves think about your relationships right where are you showing up harshly where can you be more gentle and you will find you'll actually be more influential people will want to
• 23:30 - 24:00 come and be with you as opposed to running away from you and uh and definitely being more forgiving with people in may Allah make us of those who are soft-hearted inshah and and easy to forgive you know be be forgiving and pardon don't you want Allah to Pardon you and to forgive you so you treat the people as you want Allah to treat you so it goes back to if you want that Toba from Allah despite your mistake how much are you you willing to forgive someone despite their mistake you know in the
• 24:00 - 24:30 capacity of cuz like always grounds this I mean the prophet wasam really loved ham I mean he cried over ham like he didn't cry over anyone else ham was his uncle he was his best friend he was his brother and you know his foster brother like there's so much between him and for him to see ham in that state he could have turned on his people with such anger and like you did this and I don't want to talk to you for you know for a
• 24:30 - 25:00 month I don't you know get away from me this is look what you did we don't even have the names of the 40 companions that came down from from that that Hill like we don't even know who they are you know Subhan Allah like the prophet s did not make him line up in front of the Masjid for some time and like make an example out of them none that none of that and that I mean he's someone you want to be around like to the point that you know it's funny that you mentioned that like all the harm he did to the prophet wasallam all the harm he did to the
• 25:00 - 25:30 prophet over two decades trying to pursue even tried to mess up abisinia for the prophet wasam right tried to mess up Hab fought the prophet sallam in all these battles and then just you know being a Muslim for less than a year comes out to the prophet wasam and says who's the most beloved person in the world to you and the prophet sallam is like you know he says and then and then who he said Abu Bak ABA he said her father then who then om he said all right I'm going to stop here cuz I don't know if I'm going to get a mention but
• 25:30 - 26:00 he thought that he was the prophet's best friend less than a year of being a muslim with all the harm he did to the prophet wasallam like that's the Forgiveness of the Prophet Sall like even after you became Muslim he still is going to treat you that way so it's it's it's very simple that and I think we can we can you know really take this as as as a serious take-home message that look what you're asking from Allah in this Ramadan make sure you're willing to give it to people it's as simple as that y and then that's what it all comes down to
• 26:00 - 26:30 absolutely any final thoughts from no I was just thinking what sister L was talking about I'm wondering if you mentioned that in your the coup's Retreats M oh absolutely we we we mentioned we uh Subhan Allah are you talking about this Hadith ofe like you're talking about like being rough and how five times it takes you know oh absolutely we do I mean it's unbelievable the the the small changes that you can make that can really be so
• 26:30 - 27:00 profound in a relationship it's so profound so we absolutely cover that and we cover that Hadith too because it's beautiful that Prophet wasallam referred you know who who is the most beloved to you and he mentioned his wife he could you know this is Arabian you know like and and you're St you're you're stating uh the love for your wife in front of all these men I think that was powerful and then even when he mentioned her dad so both of those yeah absolutely amazing you know it just takes it just
• 27:00 - 27:30 takes us to be self just you know take take down the the ego a bit and be able to say you know what it's okay I can change I don't have to do I don't have to behave in this harsh manner I can change and and that can be a little bit difficult but once you make that commitment and ask Allah for help it's possible we can make those differences in our relationships I want to ask it it's kind of it's somewhat it's related do you feel that like when you these Retreats happen that they go M California there's nature
• 27:30 - 28:00 Mah cuz you know you're in the rat race you know as a couple you go to work come back home what what do you advise as far as releasing and detaching in order for that introspection to happen is that something that is Paramount would you advise couples youis husband and wives with that like does the husband need to spend time alone at times cuz he's wake he goes comes home and he goes to work goes and then something happens and then he's so what would you advise in that regard in this context of of a having that introspection to where you even
• 28:00 - 28:30 think about absolutely that's that's a great that's a great Point how do you even get to that point yeah we are so busy and we're so stressed out and there's so much going on and Subhan Allah and you know what's going on in the world and and our our heart goes out Subhan Allah to all the people who are suffering uh you know with Injustice and and and Subhan Allah all that's happening we do have to spend time alone and I think it's amazing to spend time in nature you know uh uh it just kind of clears the mind don't look at your phone be in a quiet space and say you know how are my relationships and and how do I
• 28:30 - 29:00 want to make them better do do I see people running away from me you know I'm sure you've seen those situations where your kids you know they hear the door open and they're going in another room Subhan Allah absolutely but but absolutely as a couple then to after you've reflected and to go out and spend time alone it's a game changer it's a game changer cuz now you're not talking about dishes and laundry and bills and who did this and who you're just you're focused it just goes to show you how how important it is to to give things that
• 29:00 - 29:30 are important in your life it's due time so just in conclusion for everyone Subhan Allah I mean look at we went we go from the odds to forgiveness to how you want your own relationships to be Subhan Allah just think about it this wayak starts off with the Redemption of and we have the Redemption of the community after in particular Allah is lifting up uh people after their their mistakes there slips in so we ask Allah T to be
• 29:30 - 30:00 merciful with us as he always is and to enable us in that Mercy to seek forgiveness from him and we ask Allah to grant us as a result of that gratitude and victory in all of our Affairs as individuals and as a community to everyone for tuning in we'll see you all tomorrow [Music]