Pickup Korea Podcast: The Seoul Player - Jack North

Summary

In this episode, the Pickup Korea Podcast dives into the Seoul dating scene with veteran Jack North from The Seoul Player. The discussion covers everything from the impact of COVID-19 on socializing in Korea, the art of "gaming" in different neighborhoods like Gangnam and Hongdae, to personal journeys of adapting and mastering the dating scene in Korea. Jack and Kepler share insights into the cultural differences, trial and error learning processes, and the application of dating skills in varied aspects of life. The conversation is rich with humor, candid anecdotes, and tips for anyone interested in dating Korean women.

Highlights

• COVID-19 opened doors to different dating opportunities as people were more available and eager to socialize 📈.
• Gangnam vs. Hongdae: Unique vibes and varying receptiveness to dating approaches between these neighborhoods 🌆.
• The three-day rule: Meeting someone within a short period of obtaining their number drastically increases success rates 📅.
• Cultural adaptation: Realizing that Western pickup methods aren’t always effective in Korea 🌐.
• Texbook knowledge about dating doesn’t work without real-life practice and experience in Korea 🤓.

Key Takeaways

• COVID-19 created unexpected opportunities for dating in Korea 🎉.
• Adapting dating strategies across different Seoul neighborhoods 🏙️.
• The importance of quick follow-up with new contacts in Korea 📞.
• Trial and error is crucial for mastering dating skills in a new culture 🔍.
• Cultural nuances can significantly influence dating dynamics 🇰🇷.

Overview

Jack North shares his fascinating journey of living in Korea for over a decade, discussing how his and his fellow podcast host Kepler’s experiences have shaped their understanding of the dating scene. They delve into how Korea's distinct culture affects dating dynamics, often contrasting it with Western methods. The conversation reveals humorous mishaps and crucial learnings, offering listeners an inside look at the art of dating in Seoul.

The discussion turns to the impact of COVID-19 on dating in Korea. Surprisingly, the pandemic has led to new dating landscapes with more people open to connections as usual social venues were shut down. Jack and Kepler discuss how this shift has made certain groups more accessible, transforming dating into a more adventurous experience.

Moving between neighborhoods like Gangnam and Hongdae presents unique dating challenges and opportunities. The hosts banter about the varied reception of flashy styles and approaches in different locales, offering insights into how understanding these cultural subtleties can significantly improve one’s dating success in Korea.

Chapters

• 00:00 - 00:30: Introduction The chapter opens with an introduction to the 'Pick Up Korea' podcast, featuring a special guest, Jack North from thesoulplayer.com. The host welcomes Jack and asks him to introduce himself. Jack responds, mentioning his connection to thesoulplayer.com and expresses his pleasure in being on the podcast. The dialogue reveals that the host has been in Korea for 10 years, while Jack has been there for 11 years, establishing them both as veterans familiar with the Korean social scene.
• 00:30 - 01:00: Perspectives on Korean Game The chapter discusses the importance of gaining various perspectives within the Korean gaming industry. The speaker emphasizes learning from different viewpoints and applying what resonates personally, likening this approach to Bruce Lee's martial arts philosophy of Jeet Kune Do, where one draws from all sources. The metaphor extends to Mixed Martial Arts (MMA), highlighting the integration of multiple disciplines such as jiu-jitsu, muay thai, and judo to create a comprehensive skill set in both gaming and life.
• 01:00 - 01:30: Impact of COVID-19 on Dating The chapter explores the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on dating life. It begins with a discussion on how the pandemic, being the major news topic, has prompted people to question and adjust their dating strategies. The narrative describes the initial months of the pandemic as particularly challenging for everyone involved.
• 01:30 - 02:00: Observations About Flight Attendants During COVID-19 The chapter discusses the state of the world, particularly focusing on Korea, during the COVID-19 pandemic. It highlights a general sentiment of overcoming the pandemic, as people in Korea have adjusted and moved on after the crisis. The situation seems to be improving as fewer people are going out, which may present more opportunities for interactions, especially emphasizing the availability of women in social spaces, regardless of circumstances like a pandemic or even a hypothetical zombie apocalypse.
• 02:00 - 02:30: Changing Dynamics of Social Life in Korea Due to COVID-19 The chapter 'Changing Dynamics of Social Life in Korea Due to COVID-19' explores the evolving behavior of individuals, particularly young women, in the social scene amidst the pandemic. It discusses how some girls seem to have become more liberated and open in their interactions than before, as evidenced by anecdotal observations from the speaker. The conversation also touches upon personal preferences, such as an affection for flight attendants, comparing experiences in Korea and the U.S. to highlight cultural differences in social interactions.
• 02:30 - 03:00: Shift to Local Neighborhood Dating The chapter discusses a shift in dating dynamics towards local neighborhood dating, particularly highlighting the effects of the pandemic on social interactions. In places like Korea, attractive individuals such as flight attendants, who were once hard to approach, are now more accessible due to the restrictions on flying. This change has made it easier for people to meet attractive individuals who are usually more elusive. The chapter also touches on societal norms and expectations, particularly in Korea, regarding the selection of individuals in certain professions based on looks and the current limitations faced by those professions.
• 03:00 - 03:30: Rise of K-Pop and Increase in Foreigners in Korea The chapter discusses the impact of K-Pop’s popularity and a rising foreigner population on social dynamics in Korea, particularly focusing on how these changes affect the social opportunities for women who work in nightlife. These women have found themselves with more free time and different scheduling flexibility as a result of the shifts in nightlife and entertainment, possibly leading to a greater openness or willingness to engage in different social encounters.
• 03:30 - 04:00: Reason for Coming to Korea The chapter discusses the vibrant nightlife culture in Korea, emphasizing the 24/7 party atmosphere. It highlights how bars and clubs in Korea often remain open until 11 a.m., creating a non-stop party environment.
• 04:00 - 04:30: Comparisons between Korea and Taiwan The chapter discusses the current atmosphere in popular areas of Korea like Itaewon, Kangnam, and Hongdae, noting that many of the major venues are now closed. This has changed the social dynamics, making outings such as going for a drink a more special occasion than they were before the COVID-19 pandemic. This situation can be especially beneficial for people who don't live in the main party areas, as events are now more valued and anticipated.
• 04:30 - 05:00: Differences in Dating Scenes: North vs South of Seoul's River This chapter discusses the differing dating experiences and expectations in Seoul, particularly contrasting neighborhoods north and south of the river. The author shares personal insights on how dating dynamics have evolved, moving away from high-cost dates in trendy city areas to more laid-back, cost-effective experiences in local, residential neighborhoods. The emphasis is on genuine connection and enjoyment without the pressure of expensive outings.
• 05:00 - 05:30: Personal Experiences in Different areas of Seoul The chapter provides a narrative of personal experiences in various localities within Seoul, leading to a discussion about what initially drew people to South Korea. The dialogue suggests that the speaker and another individual have lived in Korea for quite a time and pondering upon the significant cultural influx seen with the rise of K-pop, dramas, and Korean movies which captured international interest only in the past few years. This influence dubbed as 'koreaboos' didn't emerge massively until around four years ago. The speaker reflects on the curiosity and experiences of being a foreign veteran in the country before this cultural boom.
• 05:30 - 06:00: Advice on Exploring Different Areas In the chapter titled 'Advice on Exploring Different Areas,' the speaker shares their personal journey that led them to explore opportunities abroad. It highlights the significant impact of the 2008 financial crash, which coincided with their graduation. Faced with a challenging job market, they decided to take a friend's suggestion to consider teaching in Asia. After receiving offers from both Korea and Taiwan, they made a spontaneous decision by flipping a coin, which resulted in moving to Korea. This decision marked the beginning of an 11-year journey abroad that they reflect on positively.
• 06:00 - 06:30: Learning Korean Game and Differences from Western Methods This chapter discusses the experiences and impressions of traveling to Taiwan, specifically focusing on the narrator's time in Kaohsiung, as opposed to the more commonly visited Taipei. They share their travel decisions based on cost and personal recommendations from locals met through couchsurfing. The discussion provides insight into personal travel narratives and highlights the influence of local advice on travel experiences.
• 06:30 - 07:00: Trial and Error in Learning Korean Dating Dynamics In this chapter titled "Trial and Error in Learning Korean Dating Dynamics," the narrator compares his experiences between Taiwan and Korea. Initially skeptical about staying in Korea, he trusted a friend's recommendation, leading to a positive experience. He notes that Korea, being a larger country, places a significant emphasis on appearance, contributing to a perception of 'hotter' girls compared to Taiwan. Furthermore, he highlights that Korea offers more job opportunities and better pay, enhancing his overall experience.
• 07:00 - 07:30: Cultural Differences in Dating The chapter discusses cultural differences in dating, with a focus on the comparison of job markets and cost of living between Korea and Taiwan. The speaker mentions how, 11 years ago, Korean jobs paid more but the cost of living differences made the pay comparable to that in Taiwan. The conversation briefly touches on the locations within Seoul, specifically the Kangnam area and the northern Kangbuk area.
• 07:30 - 08:00: Importance of Knowing Who You Are The chapter explores the theme of self-discovery and understanding oneself through the context of the speaker's experiences in different areas of Seoul, such as Hongdae, Itaewon, and Gangnam. The speaker suggests an interesting conversation about the differences noticed between the areas, specifically when engaging in activities like gaming. The conversation touches upon the cultural and social contrasts between regions, such as South River (Gangnam) and North River (Kangbuk). This exploration of different environments serves as a metaphor for understanding different aspects of one's personality and identity.
• 08:00 - 08:30: Cultural Differences and Influence on Relationships The chapter explores the cultural differences and how they influence interactions and relationships. It highlights that in the north, individuals, particularly girls, are more open and receptive to conversation, allowing people to express themselves freely. In contrast, in the south, while people might be less receptive to extended conversation, they are more responsive to noticeable or distinctive traits, such as unique attire or accessories. This suggests that cultural norms in different regions influence how people perceive and react to others' personalities and presentations.
• 08:30 - 09:00: Understanding Group Dynamics in Dating The author discusses their experiences in different social settings, particularly focusing on how appearance and attire influence interactions in dating, especially in specific locations like Gangnam and Hongdae. The narrative highlights how clothing choices can serve as conversation starters or attract attention from others, noting that attire such as a tie-dyed t-shirt can lead to being approached by others. Furthermore, the author contrasts the responses they receive in Gangnam, where people might approach based on appearance, with Hongdae, where such interactions are less common. Despite being approached, the author also notes encountering high defenses during interactions in Gangnam.
• 09:00 - 09:30: Approaching Different Types of People and Locations In this chapter, the author discusses the varying reactions of women to being approached in different locations, particularly within South Korea. He notes that women in areas like Hongdae are more receptive to approaches compared to those in Gangnam, where women are accustomed to frequent attention from men. The chapter highlights the social dynamics and contrasts between approaching women in different districts, emphasizing how perceived attractiveness and cultural environment influence interaction outcomes.
• 09:30 - 10:00: Personal Journey of Learning Game in Korea The chapter discusses the personal experiences of an individual learning game in Korea, with a focus on social interactions and dating culture in regions like Gangnam, Shinsa, and Akujong. The narrator highlights the responsiveness and openness of people in these areas, which sometimes catches them off guard compared to their previous experiences. Despite encountering challenges like people having 'shields,' they appreciate the quality and appeal of individuals they meet, including models and actresses.
• 10:00 - 10:30: Reflections and Changes in Personal Methods In this chapter titled 'Reflections and Changes in Personal Methods,' the narrator shares experiences and observations from social outings in various locations. The narrative mentions interactions with different types of people, particularly hostesses in specific areas. The storyteller recounts a recent trip to a place called Akgujeon with a friend, meeting halfway in the Gangnam area, simply to relax, have some beers, and roam around.
• 10:30 - 11:00: Importance of Immediate Follow-up in Dating The chapter discusses the importance of immediate follow-up in dating, illustrated by a personal anecdote where the speaker received five phone numbers from people they deemed attractive, referred to as 'nines'. The speaker suggests that showing disinterest authentically can attract people. This persona of 'genuinely not caring' can sometimes draw others towards you.
• 11:00 - 11:30: The Three-Day Rule in Dating The chapter discusses the narrator's experience in Gangnam after not visiting for a few years. The narrator is surprised by the positive reception and acknowledges changes in themselves, pondering whether it's due to inner mindset changes, outward appearance changes, or other factors. Despite feeling that they are older and less attractive now than five years ago, the results are unexpectedly better, suggesting a shift or growth on a personal level.
• 11:30 - 12:00: Long-term and Short-term Dating Goals The chapter discusses the differences in social scenes and dating cultures between different areas, specifically comparing Hongdae and Itaewon with Gangnam. The environments in Hongdae and Itaewon are described as diverse and reminiscent of American styles, with a variety of looks and unique fashion trends. In contrast, Gangnam is characterized by a more mainstream Korean style, with a particular emphasis on a certain fashion and even plastic surgery. This comparison is tied into the broader themes of dating and socializing, suggesting that the location can significantly impact one's dating experiences and cultural interactions.
• 12:00 - 12:30: Coaching and Personal Development The chapter discusses the importance of exploring different areas for personal development and growth. It focuses on various neighborhoods, highlighting their unique cultural and social aspects. Hongdae is described as more eclectic and artsy due to its connection with the art university, while Itaewon is noted for its international vibe, with residents from different countries, including Korean girls who have lived in Australia. The key advice is to avoid limiting oneself to a single area like Gangnam or Itaewon for socializing and personal growth, and instead experience the diversity of different environments.
• 12:30 - 13:00: Self-Introspection and Goal Setting in Coaching The chapter 'Self-Introspection and Goal Setting in Coaching' discusses the importance of experiencing and exploring diverse environments and meeting different types of people. By engaging with various communities or groups, individuals can quickly identify where they feel most at home or connected. In the context of a dating analogy, the chapter suggests that interacting with a variety of people allows one to understand their preferences better and to find what truly resonates with them. This process of exploring and meeting diverse individuals is highlighted as beneficial for personal growth and self-awareness, particularly in discovering one's goals and interests. Drawing from diverse experiences allows individuals to set informed and meaningful goals based on their self-introspection.
• 13:00 - 13:30: Global Differences in Dating Dynamics The chapter discusses the influence of global cultural differences on dating dynamics, highlighting personal experiences. The speaker reflects on past relationships and the importance of dating various individuals to understand compatibility better. They share a personal anecdote of a past relationship they believed was destined for marriage until they gained broader perspectives from dating others. This exploration led to a better understanding of what personality traits complement each other. The chapter emphasizes the value of comparison and exploration in determining suitable partners, ultimately implying that experiences in different cultural contexts can significantly shape one's views on relationships. The section ends with an anecdote about Gangnam Station, potentially leading into a discussion of cultural differences in dating norms.
• 13:30 - 14:00: Emotional Challenges in Dating The narrator discusses the challenges of dating, focusing specifically on their experiences with a place called Hamnum station. Despite numerous visits, the narrator finds the experience consistently disappointing. They attribute some of the difficulty to timing, noting that visiting at 6 PM results in a crowded and overwhelming atmosphere. The variation in people present at different times affects the quality of interactions.
• 14:00 - 14:30: Initial Interaction and Investment This chapter discusses the variability in quality of experiences depending on the time, specifically in the context of social venues. The speaker reflects on their experiences with night outings, expressing a preference for daytime social activities. They also compare different venues, noting that some locations are notably superior to others.
• 14:30 - 15:00: Building Influence and Compliance The chapter "Building Influence and Compliance" discusses nightlife in Gangnam, specifically the closure of high-end clubs like Arena due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Despite these closures, some spots, such as one referred to as "drum," remain popular and continue to thrive. The text implies that personal style and preferences greatly influence which locations one might find appealing.
• 15:00 - 15:30: Why Choose Korea for Dating This chapter discusses the appeal of Korea as a dating destination. It describes an experience at a venue that was advertised as a 'bar club', highlighting the blend of atmospheres found in such places - not quite a club, but more than a typical bar. The speaker notes the availability of only Budweiser beer at a high price, suggesting a mix of high-end and casual vibe. Additionally, it mentions that while some fancy places exist, there are still preferred spots that offer a better experience.
• 15:30 - 16:00: Cultural and Aesthetic Comparisons within Asia The chapter discusses the social dynamics and nightlife culture in Asia, particularly focusing on how people interact and socialize in informal settings like convenience stores and 'pochas' (a type of casual Korean bar or restaurant). It describes a strategy where individuals hang out at convenience stores to meet people waiting to enter popular pochas, highlighting the interplay of spontaneity and planned social interactions in these settings. The narrative touches on the waiting culture and how it creates opportunities for spontaneous interactions while waiting for entry into crowded social venues.
• 16:00 - 16:30: Reflections on Living in Korea The chapter reflects on the experiences of living in Korea, particularly focusing on the nightlife and social scene. The narrator shares insights about meeting people, especially women, outside popular venues without having to pay for entry. The narrator recounts learning social skills or 'game' from Korean friends who were very adept at navigating these social situations. However, it is noted that the narrator does not frequent such venues as much anymore.
• 16:30 - 17:00: Conclusion and Call to Action The chapter reflects on the speaker's personal journey, with insights gained from friends who were naturally talented. The learning process was likened to scientific experimentation. The speaker reflects on the cultural incongruence faced when applying popular methodologies like the mystery method, popular 10 years ago, within Korean society.

Pickup Korea Podcast: The Seoul Player - Jack North Transcription

• 00:00 - 00:30 hello everyone welcome to the pick up korea podcast and today i have a very special guest um jack north from thesoulplayer.com and uh yeah can you introduce yourself hey guys i'm jack like he said from the soulplayer soulplayer.com and uh it's very good to be here cool yeah so i've been in korea for 10 years and i've been coaching and uh jack has been here how long about 11 years now right so we're literally both like the veterans of korea who really you know korean game is like
• 00:30 - 01:00 our bread and butter and it's really good to get different perspectives like my view is that you really want to learn from different people get different views and apply what works for you you know sort of the uh like the bruce lee jeep condo right like sure you draw from all sources and make uh make game and make life your own like what you want to do right so it's like the mma of games yeah there you go exactly like the mma of game right you got your jiu jitsu you got your muay thai your striking your ground game right so uh and if you ain't got judo you ain't [ __ ]
• 01:00 - 01:30 yeah exactly exactly there we go uh so uh yeah i'm curious um actually the first question i'm really really curious about is how has uh kobit 19 the coronavirus that's the biggest news these days right sure and so what everyone's you know asking me you know what are you doing because of coronavirus and how has that affected your um your game or your dating and stuff like that these days so obviously the uh the first month or two months or so were a bit harrowing for everybody
• 01:30 - 02:00 not just in korea but worldwide but once everybody in korea kind of got over it which it seems that they have at this point right and they they have now for months um everything is it's just going fine in fact it might even be going even better because a lot of guys still aren't going out right and so whenever you go out there are girls out there always going to be girls out i don't care if they're it's the zombie apocalypse there are
• 02:00 - 02:30 still going to be thoughts out at the bar looking for guys for sure for sure for sure i've even noticed i don't know about you but i've noticed that girls um a lot of girls are more free than they usually were like we were talking about earlier before this uh podcast about like flight attendants we both really like flight attendants because in college well okay i'll explain how you can't uh you've been you've been to america have you seen them now that that doesn't count and you know it all right right right like if you ever take like delta or something it's just like really
• 02:30 - 03:00 old overweight platforms in korea or gay dudes or gay dudes exactly but in korea they literally hand pick young tall good-looking you know women to be flight attendants plus yeah and there are rules exactly exactly so what i've noticed is like flight attendants even this weekend i met a flight attendant and they're all you know grounded they can't really fly or even if they are flying it's very limited so sure so those girls that are usually kind of harder to meet they're a lot more available
• 03:00 - 03:30 um other girls that work at bars or clubs or that is like that excellent observation that i had not considered yeah even a lot of night workers they're lower on work these days or they like they don't work as much right sure and so yeah it kind of opens the field to like different types of girls that are often harder to meet right because their schedules are a little bit more free or they're a lot of the activities that they usually do are sort of restricted right now sure so i also imagine that they would be even more i don't know let's say grateful or excited to go out with a guy who has a bit of
• 03:30 - 04:00 extra capital to spend on a nice date out or a few extra drinks on that exactly exactly they're just excited to go out i feel like and then meet people in general where it's like before you know any day can be a day out and you know the clubs and bars were full non-stop you know korea it's like a 24 7 party party yeah there's clubs that are open here until 11 a.m it's nuts right like people there's bars or you go to restaurants and they're just non-stop serving alcohol right sure and so uh
• 04:00 - 04:30 you know now that it's a lot more tame or a lot of it a lot of the places in itaewon like we were talking about earlier itaewon or kangnam hongdae a lot of these like major venues are closed so when you you're inviting them out to a drink or something it's even more of a what would you say it's even more of like a special chance or a gift or something they're really looking forward to as opposed to pre covet 19 right yeah yeah and this also uh i think that this can benefit guys who don't live in the main party centrals right because before this
• 04:30 - 05:00 if you lived in hong kong then you were golden right but nowadays you meet girls in your local neighborhood maybe a residential neighborhood like mine right i live nowhere near any bars or clubs or anything like that but you meet a girl around here and you can take her out to some of the little local hops and she's going to be super excited to just be out of the house be doing something and you don't have to go out you don't have to i don't know drop a few hundred dollars on the night you could probably get through the whole night on like 40 50 bucks even
• 05:00 - 05:30 oh for sure for sure i totally agree um i'm actually curious what uh brought you to korea because you've been here even a year longer than me it sounds like yeah and i remember when i first got here you know there was a sizable amount of foreigners but it wasn't until like the k-pop wave really blew up like the drama the k-pop and now the movies are you know koreaboos yeah yeah yeah exactly that didn't really happen until about four years ago maybe something like that a few years ago and uh so i'm curious like what brought you you know since we were both veterans
• 05:30 - 06:00 what was the thing that kind of brought you here uh i mean do you remember the 2008 financial crash yep so that's when i graduated from university and obviously jobs were not happening then so uh i had a friend who had taught in japan and i was like okay cool so i started looking into teaching in asia and i got offered a job in korea and i got offered a job in taiwan at the same time i flipped a coin it landed korea i flew out the next week and i never looked back 11 years ago
• 06:00 - 06:30 interesting have you ever been to taiwan's i mean yeah did you ever go since how did you like taiwan oh i loved taiwan it's fantastic it is a cool place but i skipped taipei actually i went i went down south i went down to kaohsiung oh i've never been there i've been to taipei but yeah so i i landed first in kaohsiung because the flight was cheaper and my plan was to go up to taipei so i was staying with somebody on couchsurfing that night and the guy and his his living girlfriend they were both like look just skip taipei stay with us for
• 06:30 - 07:00 your time here and we'll show you around to all the cool stuff here this is way better than taipei i promise you and i was like all right cool i trust you so i stuck around there and i loved it it was fantastic yeah taiwan's a great country i would say you know i like the culture and stuff like that i would say this though um korea does have hotter girls like it's just a bigger country yeah and it's such a the appearance is so important here right so you have hotter girls you have more girls and the jobs paid better as far as i know from what i remember yeah i think i think that at least whenever i looked
• 07:00 - 07:30 at it but again this is 11 years ago whenever i looked at it the korean jobs paid more but like based on cost of living it was functionally the same where like the cost of living in taiwan was slightly lower and the pay was slightly lower so it kind of equaled yeah it was basically like the pay was kind of a toss-up gotcha okay okay cool now it may be different who knows okay i haven't looked into it in a long time okay cool so yeah actually i'm based mostly in the kangnam area of soul right and uh you're based more on the northern end which we call like kangbuk or near
• 07:30 - 08:00 the hongdae area right so that would be kind of an interesting topic because i do move around i go to hongdae sometimes i go to itaewon i go to gangnam the whole you know shinzo abecudo all these kind of places right so an interesting conversation would be like the differences right like so what are the differences that you notice or have experienced when you were gaming uh like south river i guess it would be translated right yeah and north river kangbuk um okay so the biggest differences that i've noticed
• 08:00 - 08:30 are on the north side um girls are more receptive to whatever you're saying like they're more willing to hear you out and give you a chance let you ramble let you run your game but on the south side a little bit less so however on the south side they are super responsive to any sort of uh i hesitate to use the word peacocking but you know what i mean any sort of like extra extra-ness about yourself like if i my my mask is a it's a cat face or i have a hat with a
• 08:30 - 09:00 fish on it or i'm wearing a tie-dyed t-shirt or something like that and they will they will respond to that and in fact i've had a lot of girls in gangnam open me because of something that i was wearing or because of a way that i looked things like that and so that doesn't normally happen in places like hongdae but it does happen however whenever i approach a girl in ghana her defenses are so high right right because she's
• 09:00 - 09:30 she's so used to it you know she's she's a nine she's used to guys coming up and approaching her all the time whereas in hongdae the eights think that they're sixes and so like it's just it's it's golden yeah that's true that's uh that's one thing i notice is like when i'm approaching like wherever say it chinchon or hongdae like the north river areas i feel like the girls are so much more receptive because in congress you're used to you know if you're approaching really hot girls they have such a shield right yeah and then you go to the north river it's almost like a different country it feels like sometimes i'm like whoa
• 09:30 - 10:00 they're like responding right away yeah like i'm used to having to melt down the shield a little bit sure kind of get in there a little bit yeah where it's like whoa it almost like it catches me off guard sometimes when i'm in the north river right so yeah that definitely i think that's one advantage of uh this area the advantage of condom is that you just have high quality girls everywhere though like the the the although it is they have a lot of shields and stuff like that but like if you're in shinsa or akujong or gangnam like yeah like you get like models and actresses and
• 10:00 - 10:30 you know all of these sort of like hostesses and it's just full of those you know a lot of those kind of girls for sure you know just different types of girls in different areas right yeah yeah i was actually down there about three weeks ago down in akugeon and uh and i went out just with one of my buddies because he was down in bundong so we just met halfway like in gangnam area sure right and we were just going out to sit around and just have some beers see you beers kind of walk around
• 10:30 - 11:00 just hang out that's what i did friday but here's the thing is that i ended up getting five numbers because five different nines approached me oh nice and now i know that like on like here on the podcast right you can't see this but like when you look at me you're like no nines don't approach you but they do when you when you kind of put on a special persona and whatever you just genuinely don't care right right i'm not interested in them and they can feel that and like they came for me which is it
• 11:00 - 11:30 it was shocking to me because it's been a couple of years since i've even been out to gain in gangnam and i was just blown away because i was like um okay because i i know i'm getting older and i'm not getting better looking right like there's there's no way that i should be having better results now than i did say five years ago but i think it's a lot of like maybe it's inner stuff maybe it's mindset stuff maybe it's outward stuff like appearance stuff i don't know what it is but there was something very different there
• 11:30 - 12:00 because i don't get that same thing if i go out drinking at home day if i go out drinking at home day and i don't want to talk to girls i'm not talking to a single girl you know whatever right right i think uh i think you make an interesting point is that like in the hongdae area or itaewon you have so many different looks and like it's more unique it's more american in a way yeah you get different styles and you see whereas like in gangnam there's like one it's more of like the korean mainstream like sure looking a certain way a certain fashion a certain plastic surgery
• 12:00 - 12:30 you see what i'm saying whereas when you move to like hongdae it's more eclectic it's more artsy because that's the art university and then itaewon is more of the international sure so you get like you know people from different countries and korean girls who lived in australia and things along these lines right and so that that definitely plays a big factor i would say for sure for sure so uh my general advice is to go to all areas like because there's guys who only game in the one gangnam main street or guys that only go to itaewon every weekend whereas i think it's very beneficial to
• 12:30 - 13:00 go check out different areas and sort of um you know draw from all streams and kind of find out what kind of girls you're interested in because you'll find out very quickly like once you meet a bunch of kangnam girls or a bunch of hongdae girls or whatever you'll find the areas that you resonate with more but then it is still good to like mix it up like one benefit of gaming is that you can meet several different types of girls yeah like that's why a lot of guys are in this right for sure or you know to meet the one girl venture that you're really into but how do you know that unless you met many different types right yeah so yeah i still remember my first
• 13:00 - 13:30 serious girlfriend and i was dead convinced that i was gonna marry her for sure right because i had nothing to compare it right i had nothing to compare it to and so by going out i mean thank god that i didn't marry her right but by going out and meeting different types of girls by seeing what meshed with my personality and what didn't um yeah it's very helpful now i totally agree i don't mean to to steal the interview for me but i had a serious question is it just me or just gangnam station my
• 13:30 - 14:00 gang i'm proper does it kind of suck because i've tried going there probably 20 different times and it's just been garbage every time i've been so okay the thing about hamnum station is that it a lot of it's like the times right like so if you go there at like six o'clock it's just flooded with so many people it's jam-packed so there's just there's so many different types of people to approach this because you have so much volume right sure so it's i would say it really depends on the times that you're there that's one thing
• 14:00 - 14:30 so you can go there at certain times and it's not very good and then you go there at certain times it's just like while the quality is off the chain like everywhere you look it's like there's an eight there's a nine there's a seven you know well i was going out for like night game right oh i see yeah night game honestly conversations in my opinion yeah it's not that great it's not very good well obviously we share that opinion yeah i would say it's good for day game night game it's sort of uh i would say that um the venues aren't that good it's not you know each one hongdae have much better venues um
• 14:30 - 15:00 traditionally the really really good spots in gangnam to go out at night are now closed because of copenhagen sure which were like the high-end clubs like arena and those kind of places were just full of super hot girls they're not even you know they're closed now so well uncle john was still going a couple of weeks ago whenever drum's good right now yeah that's the place right now exactly yeah that one was it was still it was still going hard like i didn't see anything closed now depending on your style right it may not agree with you that general area because like for me
• 15:00 - 15:30 right i walked into one place and it was it was advertised as like a bar club do you know what i mean like sure not not a club but like it's kind of got the lights but it's still a bar right okay okay and and so i went in there and the only beer that they had available was a budweiser for eleven thousand won no i'm not no or ordering bottles and i'm like right again no to be honest i think uh option has some really nice fancy pochas and venues right now but i still think the best spot there is
• 15:30 - 16:00 just on the street at the uh convenience store because you get all the girls walking by and they're all going to the different pochas and stuff in the area and a lot of the poaches if you go there after 11 it's uh there's like a waiting list so yes what i've been doing this is kind of funny but what i've been doing is i hang out at the convenience store and drink and then i walk by the poaches and the girls are just around waiting sure to get in to have food and drinks yeah and i just pick them up on the street while they're in you know exactly they're not really in line they're more on the waiting list so they're waiting for their name to be called yeah and it takes like an hour
• 16:00 - 16:30 apparently so like you can just scoop them all up before they get into the venue you know right just like uh you know it's perfect because you're not paying any money to go into these venues and you meet the hottest girls that are waiting to get in so that's sort of uh what i found to be the best you know so have you ever had any luck in poaches or hofstra i mean inside once you go in not on the waiting list right i would say not these days because i don't go to them that much but back in the day when i first got to korea um i learned a lot of game from korean guys like i had some korean guy friends that were really good
• 16:30 - 17:00 interesting yeah yeah actually i had a couple friends that were like naturals and they were really good so that's where i learned a lot of a lot of what i do now is based on what i learned back then because i was sort of like a scientist i was experimenting like because you know that's one question i do want to ask you is that when we were learning back then this is 10 years ago yeah that was like when the game was popular and like mystery method was kind of popular rsd and all this kind of stuff right and it just wasn't really congruent with korean society or pyramid korea at all
• 17:00 - 17:30 like in fact i would say it actually gets you worse results than even you know just doing random things i would say right yeah and so back then i was trying to figure it out like i even remember i read those books and i was like i'll try it out and it just didn't like pan out right no it doesn't groove here yeah exactly so uh for me you know i just had to kind of i had a few friends and we'd sort of exchange notes right we'd make little challenges for each other yeah like uh okay let's try this and we'll try that for a week and test it thoroughly like i'm noticing this result you're noticing that result and oftentimes our
• 17:30 - 18:00 results were very similar because we were doing kind of similar things right and uh then i made a couple good korean friends who were like naturals and uh learned a lot from them so at that time yeah i did get some okay results from poaches like we would pull together from voces but one thing that sucks about poaches which is why i kind of stopped going to them is it's almost assumed that you're gonna pay for their food or drinks a lot of them even have a system where it says like if you join tables you have to pay for the girl stuff oh [ __ ] yeah so i was like wait a minute so
• 18:00 - 18:30 i realized that it's a lot better to just meet them on the street outside of the pocha or another way to do it is um you know chat them up get their number and then meet them later in the night rather than going to the table and then drinking and then having to buy all that stuff right yeah you know that could be a good experience in the beginning just to get your social skills up and to learn dynamics and stuff like that but you know after so much time like the juice isn't worth the squeeze you know there's other ways to do it more efficiently for sure group dynamics are an
• 18:30 - 19:00 interesting thing because i meet a lot of guys who maybe their game is pretty solid but they don't understand group dynamics very well and so they're so scared to approach a two center a three set correct or something like that right which always blows my mind because if i have the choice between a single girl or a two set i would always rather take the two or three sam okay okay because i i don't know and i know that this plays to my personality type right i'm more of an entertainer type and
• 19:00 - 19:30 so for me having if i'm talking one-on-one to a girl then if she's letting me talk to her i'm at least at a maybe right i'm not i'm not on a definite note if we're talking if she's at least responding exactly then i'm in a maybe right and now my job is to convince a hundred percent of my audience that i'm a yes but if i'm talking with a three cent then i'm a maybe with all three of them my job is only to convince one third of my audience that i'm a yes because if you convince one
• 19:30 - 20:00 man this this country and their herd dynamics here if one of them says yes the other two are yes for sure right right right and now all of a sudden you you can see like okay i can i i'm talking to this group and i can pinpoint okay you're the most interested in me and so i can play something to you or i can play a joke off your friend on to you and then you're gonna go yes immediately and then it flips the whole group right right i think it's what it is is there like some guys just don't have the
• 20:00 - 20:30 experience doing it or they're afraid it's intimidating to approach two or three girls right yeah and so i think it's very important experience yeah you have to go in there exactly that's what we're talking about earlier is that that's why i think it's good to go to different areas of seoul talk to different types of girls talk to single girls talk to groups right that way you can you know you'll be comfortable if you do that you'll know what you're into and you'll be comfortable in all the different situations right so it's very important um yeah one question i was going to ask you to kind of go back a little bit and unpack it was we both got to korea
• 20:30 - 21:00 and i kind of mentioned that i had a friend and we would shoot data off each other and yeah experiment kind of like bad scientists in ways right and i had korean guys that i learned a bit from but for you um and obviously we mentioned that the game can be so different in korea compared to america and the whole you know western pickup methods and stuff so for you how did you learn and then also like what did you notice that was different from america i'm very curious about that so much trial and error that's how i learned like yep
• 21:00 - 21:30 whenever i first got to korea i mean i know that most people especially guys in seoul these days like they're not gonna believe this it took me six months to get laid six months now i was living in the middle of nowhere and it was two thousand okay right and so like uh it was it was a different different thing all together but me that took me months actually yeah when i first got here was just very confusing right and it was very frustrating that's why i think we both we both got here kind of at a similar
• 21:30 - 22:00 time so we really both have to do trial and error and there's nobody like jack north or me kepler there's nobody at the time actually that was like in korea with that would get results and could actually explain any of this so yeah well and so that that was actually my impetus to start the site back in 2015 is because i thought to myself like man i've spent the last six years just fail fail fail fail fail succeed okay let's try something different fail
• 22:00 - 22:30 fail fail succeed and then eventually i hit uh like a malcolm gladwell tipping point where it just went fail succeed succeed succeeded right over and over and over and then i was like okay so clearly i've got something figured out here now let me help give other guys a shortcut so that maybe it doesn't take them six years maybe it takes them six months instead right exactly i agree um what were some things that you noticed that were different like when you got to korea
• 22:30 - 23:00 that kind of stood out to you like because you had been in america before and i'm sure you've dated or had some experience with girls back then right and then you got here what were some things that you're like wow this is just totally different like because as we both mentioned we're both sort of frustrated we both um had to kind of experiment right in trial and error what were some things you're like wow this is you know much different i mean i got here and literally every other foreigner is at
• 23:00 - 23:30 least as educated as me or more right and so the idea of like oh well i am educated i am well traveled things like that that might be somewhat impressive in a place like america or europe where it's like oh yeah i've been to this many countries and somebody's like oh that's so cool i also remember when i was 21 right like uh it it changed it because the things that i had been relying on before for some kind of social proof of validation were now just that's the bare minimum to
• 23:30 - 24:00 just be here and oh good point okay right and so then i had to figure out i mean i was 23 or 24 right like i had to figure out who i was and that that took a while right because when you're 23 you're a kid you don't know [ __ ] about [ __ ] you don't even know who you are right right and so like having to do that that kind of like introspection of like well who am i what type of person am i who do i want to be and then once you figure that out okay
• 24:00 - 24:30 so what kind of what kind of approaches what kind of uh discussions what what's going to work for you what kind of venues are going to work for me right because right who you are can't just be well i'm an alcoholic english teacher because it is kind of the um the the base right the default for most people here yeah exactly and so there has to be at least even if you are an alcoholic english teacher you just don't have to be something
• 24:30 - 25:00 more something extra some figure out who you are figure out where your strengths are sure sure i mean that's an ideal world right like i think both me and you have that approach well it was a far less than ideal world yeah yeah i mean you know for guys like us we want to sort of figure this out we both were motivated to learn this kind of pick up stuff or dating out of our dating life which then in turn as you mentioned it's sort of uh i describe the process it's kind of like inner alchemy where
• 25:00 - 25:30 you're because girls will kind of reflect yourself right sure see it's like oh [ __ ] i'm talking this way or i'm coming off this way and so it's sort of this process of like trial error repeat reflect inside you know inner alchemy change your personality in a way that not not change your base personality per se no like it's sort of maximizing the you who you can be kind of thing right the way that i like to explain it is that like the the actual personality inside you who you are that's like a gift right
• 25:30 - 26:00 it's like a gift in a box and now and then you need to change the wrapping on the box exactly because you're not actually changing who you are but you may be changing even something like your mindset how you view yourself yeah it's not going to change the actual thing but it is going to change the way you behave or interact though yeah sure so maybe add some luster to your gift box and maybe you can add a ribbon things like that like so all this game stuff this is all about like how to better package what you
• 26:00 - 26:30 already have how to better explain and show what you already have i mean obviously you're not gonna walk up to a girl and tell her the worst things about you like because why would you why would you walk up to her and be like you know what listen two weeks ago i was almost in the hospital dehydrated because i had diarrhea you never opened you never open with your negative side right whether it's true or not it doesn't matter right so you still want to open with the positive aspects of yourself you want to learn how to package
• 26:30 - 27:00 what you are into a more presentable box and that's that's really the whole goal of game of all this stuff is like learning how to talk to somebody and get them to see the things that you see in yourself but in order to do that you also have to be able to see yourself exactly exactly so that's why this whole thing can be kind of really like a odyssey of the mind soul in a way that's kind of the way you pick up myself right sure and so yeah it's an interesting journey if you
• 27:00 - 27:30 decide to take it i think right yeah um but i'd say it's worthwhile right let's say that you get whatever your end goal is let's say that you meet the perfect woman okay you get married you're perfectly happy then can you just put the game down can you put down all of the stuff that you've learned that you've unpacked about yourself never because it's it's it's so critical right and yeah most people who don't do this stuff
• 27:30 - 28:00 they never bother to do that right you mean you need a salary man who got married at 19 high school sweetheart or something right he doesn't know anything about himself exactly exactly and uh oftentimes it would take something like a mid-life crisis or getting divorced and then it's like they're trying to play ketchup sure oh now what you know like well maybe we just had our quarter life crisis yeah we had it early got it got out of the system early exactly exactly so uh some other things i think are interesting that like i mentioned we both kind of have different perspectives different styles
• 28:00 - 28:30 we both game in different areas right however some of the stuff you know obviously we'll have different opinions on certain things but there are some certain things i've noticed that we both came to the same conclusions of which are some pretty fundamental things like i remember back when i first got here there was like another group who they were like oh they claimed to be these like asia pickup groups i know who you're talking about yeah and it was like this mystery based group and what they were saying mentioned the name yeah let's not mention i they who shall not be named
• 28:30 - 29:00 yes however what they were mentioning in all their like group meetings or blog posts or whatever was like oh you have to get a girl's number and just text her for years or months and like even if she's even if she's not replying because needing neediness does not exist in korea right and so i was like i was like well this is pathetic and so what i remember uh i came up on your site and i read a couple of your posts right and you hit it on the head on one of your posts and i was like yep this is exactly right because back in 2000
• 29:00 - 29:30 oh i think it was 2012 i had a friend of mine mr a we shall call him right sure and we as i mentioned we ran data off each other and we both came to this conclusion like whoa we had you know when you like i'm sure you've had this experience too where you're like it's almost hard to sleep because you just had this like big breakthrough right or epiphany you're like in your synapses you're firing right you're like holy [ __ ] it's like mind-blowing right at the time everything's a new journey right and so we came to this conclusion that like we went from like banging one girl you know or having like
• 29:30 - 30:00 one reg per really long season sure so like all of a sudden there was like a month where it's just like whoa i you know he had like 15 and i had like eight or nine or something and then you know we both had like all these different girls were dating open relationships but like what was the big thing it was basically this that we found out that when you get a phone number from a girl you really only have like within a week and it's not even really a week it's more of like you you call it i think you can call like the three-day rule yeah you call it the three-day rule but
• 30:00 - 30:30 we came to exactly and we came to the conclusion this is in 2012 that it's basically like to be liberal liberally it's four to seven days yes you called it three days that's being really strict well that's basically right it's basically right i use that because like in america the old school thing was the three-day rule was you don't call if you take your girl's number you don't call her for three days to not look needy right right right but here it's the opposite and that's why i i kept the nomenclature but what i did find out is like in that post i went into detail on it
• 30:30 - 31:00 if i met a girl within three days so let's say that i met her on saturday night i took her number right okay then if i meet her on sunday monday or tuesday then my chances of getting laid we're about 90 100 that's not i mean not it's not 100 you're gonna get laid but 100 to what you said i totally agree because yeah i actually ran the data like we were running data sheets back that's what i did as well yeah exactly and we were like so it's interesting that me and another guy and you and some other totally independently yeah all
• 31:00 - 31:30 independent i didn't even know you yeah exactly and we all came to the same conclusion that you get a number and then if you meet them literally within like we said it was like four to seven days your three days which is it's right on the cost right but but what i saw was within three days it was about a ninety percent success rate yeah four to seven days it was about a seventy percent success rate sure but seven days or more it was about a thirty percent success rate right it fell off magnificent yeah exactly i would say even after seven days maybe thirty percent
• 31:30 - 32:00 but then the longer you wait like say it's two to three weeks oh it's over it's this is like one percent something like that right and so that's one thing that like i still get results from like really old numbers right like i've had ones where it's five years ago i got a number sure i had one last year it was nine years she was 20. i i ended up closing at 29 years old this is literally i gotta remember after being a year in career and it's like obviously that worked out but is that the majority no that's no that's like 0.101 right yeah yeah so so clearly the way if you want to get
• 32:00 - 32:30 results if you want to get lays or if you want to have girlfriends like the sooner you meet them that's going to be you got to strike while the iron's hot basically in korea because the numbers just fall off so quick here right okay and so so whenever whenever you wait for too long uh then that's gonna happen but actually what i was gonna point out is that you just mentioned a minute ago that like if you want to get lace or if you want to get a girlfriend then it's it actually is the same thing because yeah uh you're not gonna get a girlfriend if you can't get lays right
• 32:30 - 33:00 that's exactly right that's exactly right so i there's people who say like i only want a girlfriend or i only want this but like you really gotta master the process first you really gotta as we mentioned discover yourself kind of figure out the dynamics of the situation and then you're going to be in a good spot to actually get a girlfriend right and the thing is if you want a girlfriend you actually need a girl to meet you and they're not going to meet you if you're texting these old numbers that already fell off like you might get one meet up every you know now and then but it's not going to be consistent enough that you can learn
• 33:00 - 33:30 anything about girls or yourself no and also you're not going to get you're not going to get a girlfriend if you don't like you said strike when the iron is hot like you have to go for it and now if you decide that you you say like okay well listen i want to take it slow with this girl okay that's fine maybe although every now and then there have been times that i've said like some of my lady friends up with a guy and they were like what's he waiting for i'm ready i'm ready to bang like why is why is he why
• 33:30 - 34:00 is he why is he driving this up there's no need for this exactly but exactly regardless let's throw that to the side for a minute even if you want a girlfriend the only way that you're going to get a girlfriend is if you have those skills exactly you can use those skills to get laid like you can use them to have a one-night stand you can use them to get a short-term relationship a fling a long-term relationship with the skills no matter what you're looking for the skills are all the same it's all the same exactly and basically it's like giving you the skill set and you decide what to do with it like i've coached guys i've coached a guy who
• 34:00 - 34:30 got married i coached a guy i've got a kid i coach guys who are in exclusive monogamous relationships other guys who have several girlfriends other guys who are only doing one-night stands everybody has different goals right of course and so it's like you give them the skill set and then they decide what they're going to do with it right it's like sort of if i taught you how to um design websites sure you could design uh you know yeah there you go you could design that you could design you know some sort of export business where you export t-shirts i mean it
• 34:30 - 35:00 really it's on you and your goals right your interest right yeah yeah exactly but giving you the skills of you know wordpress or html or what have you that's kind of like what we're doing in this field so one of the things that i do whenever i'm coaching a guy uh the very first thing that i do whenever i first meet them on the first night because my coaching sessions are weekend long we started we start on friday evening at like 6 p.m and we do friday evening and then night game and then we do all day saturday and then we do sundays like a recap and like nights a little bit of extra street game right nice
• 35:00 - 35:30 but on friday evening the first thing that we do is we sit down and we say like okay let's do a little self introspection who am i uh how would i rate myself in these different categories yes second what are my goals who do i want to meet and why third that person imagining that ideal person right so this ideal girl who wants to meet me for this ideal thing to meet my goals what is she looking for and how do i rate on what i think she's
• 35:30 - 36:00 looking for and if i'm and if i'm short in some category what should i do to change that not what should i do what will i do to change that and and so we're focusing in specifically on the goals because i i like i like the idea of teaching general skills and basic skills that they can take anywhere however if i'm going to coach a guy for a weekend what i really want is i want him to focus in super hard on like okay this
• 36:00 - 36:30 is the type of girl i want to meet this is what i want to meet her for be it a one-night stand or a long-term relationship or like whatever whatever you're looking for this is the type of girl this is what i want to meet her for and let's figure out how to tool my skill set my personality type so that i can meet this goal that i'm looking for exactly yeah that's great i ask very similar questions too like what are your long-term goals short-term goals uh what kind of girls
• 36:30 - 37:00 you're into who do you think you are what kind of person do you want to become i think we ask some very similar questions which is interesting whenever we're done with the recording i'll actually show you the the notebook where i i have all my exercises and stuff really nice on that yeah oh yeah that sounds good yeah so uh i mean obviously we've come to some conclusions like for example we just talked about the three-day rule and the as i mentioned we kind of called it the four to seven day rule four to uh seven day rule back then and uh what's interesting i've been all around
• 37:00 - 37:30 the world like i've been to europe and i've gamed i've been to america and what really like tripped me out when i was in europe is like i get these numbers and they would still be texting and wanting to meet like two weeks later sure and i was like whoa it like blew my mind because i was so i'm so uh like sharpened to korea or adjusted to korea i was like whoa the like the laws or the the law and dynamics of game change depending on the culture oftentimes it's super different yeah yeah exactly exactly so um what were
• 37:30 - 38:00 some like things you had to overcome i would say like you know everyone has challenges they have to overcome were there any specific things that you like like a tough challenge in this process that you have to overcome emotionally my biggest challenge to overcome was thinking i thought that numbers were important right okay like so i used to go out whenever whenever i was uh whenever i first got here right i would go out maybe 2010 or something okay and i would go out specifically to
• 38:00 - 38:30 collect as many numbers as i could some nights i would go out and i would bring my guitar right and this i used to think that this worked amazingly well because i would bring my guitar i'd gather a crowd around and usually like up in hongdae so it's usually like 19 to 22 year old girls and then i would just pass my phone around the crew and i'd be like hey everybody go ahead and drop your number in and we'll all hang out later right like that and so i would go home with 60 70 numbers okay okay
• 38:30 - 39:00 and then i would spend three hours the next day shooting messages like even just copy pasting messages sure take a long time blasting them all out like 60 70 people right and then i'd get like three responses right but she wasn't right right and so you have to really troubleshoot your initial interactions exactly gotcha so even even though i
• 39:00 - 39:30 thought that i was being successful i was being extraordinarily unsuccessful if you look at it percentage-wise right i was i was like down in the knots right right right right exactly exactly that's one thing is like a lot of people here that's another difference for sure in korea is a lot of girls will give you their phone number but it doesn't really mean anything no it means just like sometimes it means go away or like here it is and they'll block you right away sure so that's why what you're saying is like learning how to express yourself properly read the girl in the situation gather
• 39:30 - 40:00 some investment sure those things the dynamic of you know pick up terms they call it d1 which is nerdy but it's the dynamics of initially interacting with people that become really important to develop and learn right i've literally never heard that term obviously like cheesy corny turkey yeah okay this is not part of my world right right right it's a nerdy nerdy forum terminology right yeah so so what i usually do to to get to that point whenever i'm meeting a girl and this is this is an easy trick that anybody can
• 40:00 - 40:30 use is that like whenever i first meet her right we're talking and i finally exchanged names hey by the way i'm jack let's go ahead and play this out i'm jack nice to meet you yeah nice to meet you okay so nice to meet you and then we're going to talk for a little bit we're going to talk for a while and then eventually whenever i say oh by the way go ahead and drop your number in here and then we'll hang out later right by the way jiong stop quick test what's my name um jack okay good now i know you're invested right because
• 40:30 - 41:00 you remembered my name over the last at least three minutes or so right and then and if she doesn't remember then i say nope take the phone back say wait all right you can't you can't have my number yet not until you remember i'll give you a hint four letters starts with a j right you know you only got two choices there right right right a lot of it's basically getting investment in compliance right like getting them to invest in this interaction and getting some feed getting some involvement yeah engagement sorry and then also getting a little bit
• 41:00 - 41:30 of compliance like sure what did i say okay enter here exactly let's go over there let's go here now we're here you've got one thing leads to another right so so yeah so compliance is by the way uh for you listeners out there if you have not read influence by robert cialdini i highly recommend it because this book yeah i brought it to a long time ago yeah he goes through and he's mostly focused on like salesmanship and like things like that but the way that he terms it in his book is he calls it compliance professionals he doesn't call them salesman because he
• 41:30 - 42:00 also looks at like religious people and things like that and listen guys this stuff is a hundred percent applicable not just to gay but to everything you do in your life anything where you want somebody to be doing what you want which is every part of life right sure sure i would call it like like he calls it influence that's a really good term i think that the ability like the ability to talk to somebody on the street and bring them home or meet them later on a date that is influence basically sure the ability to close the sale
• 42:00 - 42:30 you're persuading or you're influencing it's a very similar psychological process or the ability to go into an interview that already has a set pay right and then be like well but fifteen percent more exactly no that is the art of the game basically insane it's influencing all of it it all ties together it's not just with women it's all aspects of your life and everything you do when you're interacting with another person there is some form of influence or persuasion always going on all the time
• 42:30 - 43:00 definitely um one question i'm also interested is like why do you think that there might be a lot of listeners who come acro across this podcast why korea or why meet korean girls what about um i don't know philippines or what about you know wherever they might say right i mean to be entirely honest it all does come down to taste um if if i had to rank like east asian
• 43:00 - 43:30 countries i i don't know enough about the philippines right i haven't i haven't been there and i can't i can't rank like the island nations right but if i'm dealing with east asian countries chinese girls have the biggest boobs japanese girls usually have the best faces but those teeth bro [ __ ] jaws anyhow korean girls have the best overall package and also i'd say that they're just they're the kindest of them like they're they're the most uh understanding and admittable they're
• 43:30 - 44:00 they're willing to follow you if you're a good leader and if you're willing to to show them okay here's what we're doing here's why we're doing it this is the thing this is just what's next yeah they they will follow you i agree i agree with what you said i think that the chinese girls are like a bit too there's a bit a bit of i don't want to say rebellious nature because it's not quite that but they're almost american style like no i'm not doing that just because you said so yeah it's a little bit more direct in a way i
• 44:00 - 44:30 feel like right so yeah that's why i would say the same thing like if you're in east asia like in japan um one thing that i don't like about japanese they're very they like hide their emotions they're not like a lot of people are in japan they feel alienated because there's less emotional connection than german you know it can be very robotic in the way that people interact and the way the society is set up and i that's another stereotype for sure but uh like in korea you feel like you can actually there is emotional connection there's emotional
• 44:30 - 45:00 expression in the culture it is almost like it's like asia but mixed with like some latin aspects because you have a very like if you watch that if you ever watch like um because i'm part mexican as well if you watch like novellas and then you watch korean dramas there's like a lot of similarities whereas oh they're identical they're yeah in ways they're very identical but when you watch like chinese or japanese drum it's like another you know actually lady north loves oh very great she loves the queen of the south right right because it's nice that's it's the same right it's the same as korean dramas
• 45:00 - 45:30 exactly exactly so i think that's a benefit of korea for sure and then as as you mentioned i think that's true like china has some definitely you know it just has a big population so you're going to have a lot of like but then some super hot chicks or like in japan definitely there's good makeup some good faces but like less of a full package i feel like whereas korea is sort of like korea literally is situated in between china and japan so i feel like they kind of get the best the best outfit yeah yeah yeah they get like some of the cool things from japan some of the cool things from china it's like that's my view on it that's how i feel
• 45:30 - 46:00 about it uh the other thing is that just the overall average of looks in korea is i mean at least from an american perspective it's probably about a seven to an eight right from an american from an american perspective but here's the thing is that i can't say the same thing about japan or china right when i'm talking about the overall average yeah obviously in china you have you have the same the same thing that you have in places like america but you you essentially have the olympic syndrome
• 46:00 - 46:30 where if you're just looking at the far end yeah when you're dealing with 1.2 billion people then the hottest hot girls are gonna be so hot right yeah exactly that's that's why i view china for sure too and i think both those countries though i mean that's not to say you shouldn't go to china or japan you really should you should go check those places out they might resonate with you more too sure and they both uh i think all the different countries i mean whether it's china korea japan or european countries or american states perhaps they all have trade-offs and benefits and pros and cons so yeah yeah
• 46:30 - 47:00 definitely check it out but i think we did pretty much like summarize what the pros of korea are and why it is really really worth checking out if you've never been here before korea is just yeah honestly like you said you you've traveled a lot and i have two and and we both decided to settle here yeah like from my for my perspective there's no better place in the world to live right it's not a great tourist country but unless you're like uh would you call
• 47:00 - 47:30 them earlier korean bows oh yeah koreaboos booze right unless you're like really into the drama or music or something like that if you're if you're really drawn to like specifically the korean culture for for some external reason then fine but just as like a general tourist this is not a great tourist country but it's an amazing place to just live to be yeah exactly i totally agree anyways yeah it's been a great interview and people can check you out at thesoleplayer.com right okay so this is
• 47:30 - 48:00 uh i think we could probably do a round two another time for sure absolutely and by the way uh if you guys are big fans of kevin then come and join us at the forum dot the soulplayer.com because together is also a member on the forum how can they find the form well you can go to forum.thesoulplayer.com or if you go to the website it's one of the links on the very top of the page you'll find the forum i promise you okay cool yeah definitely check that out and uh signing out until next time next time